#blazerina babbles

[blazerina]

Tethered (Rob x Selena) Romance Club - Arcanum

I’ve never wanted to stay before. I’ve always wanted to leave. Be on the run. Go. Move. Never get stuck in one place, with the same person or people, for too long. None of that steady and stable stuff has ever served me well.

If I’m the one who’s moving forward – making all the decisions – constantly bouncing from place to place – then I’m never the one left behind. I’ve suffered through that feeling once and I promised myself I’d never go back there. I’d do everything in my power to ensure that I was never left again.

People think you cannot control your own destiny, but I disagree. There is plenty I can control. Sure, some things still have not gone completely according to plan, but I am able to manage and handle quite a bit on my own. I’ve done just fine thus far.

There’s still something inside of me that wants to be rooted. Grounded. Connected to something.

Anything.

Someone.

Anyone.

No matter how far down I try to stuff those feelings, they always come back up.

Especially when they are least expected and most unwanted.

I can feel them bubbling in the base of my gut. Crawling and creeping across the insides of my abdomen as they wake up from a deep slumber.

Hibernation.

They lay dormant and silenced due to the precise and calculating methods I’ve learned for keeping any emotion at bay.

From my belly they rise farther and farther up my spine – tingling and leaving fragments of hard, bitter, frozen bone along my back. It leaves me feeling bruised.

Brittle.

Able to snap and break into what feels like a million pieces at any moment.

Just like me, the feelings are on the move – never staying in one place for too long.

From along my back, they move to my shoulders and the base of my neck, bringing heat and tension. The muscles that wrap across my collarbone and the top of my chest ache with a dull throb.

Pulsing.

Reaching.

Stretching.

Crying out through the taught pain asking someone, anyone, something, anything, to care about what I’m going through.

What I’ve survived.

What I’ve yet to overcome.

Once the emotions of desiring stability, community, companionship reach my throat, I gulp hard again trying to control them and push them back down. My throat constricts as if I will swallow my tongue whole. Immediately my mouth becomes dry and the familiar, salty taste of my own saliva consumes me.

My brain tries to decide if what’s on my tongue is bile, tears, or blood. I think it’s a combination of all three. My body turns against me as the emotions continue to rise within. My head spins and I sweat even though I’m cold. I start to see stars as the corners of my vision fade and the very stability I myself create disappears as my legs give way and I fall to the earth I so desperately want to be bound to.

Tethered.

Connected.

Stable.

Grounded. Rooted. Committed.

Calm.

Peaceful.

Understood. Known.

Yet also…

Anchored.

Chained.

Frozen.

Unable to move.

Tied.

Captured.

Fearful.

Trapped.

And when I wake up for the millionth time after letting myself get to this point…my immediate thought is to move. To sit up. To get my bearings and run. Get as far away from anyone, anything, something, someone, who is causing me to feel this way.

Who is bringing up these foreign emotions in me? I know I’m not doing it to myself. I cannot be. I am too poised. Too controlled. Too restrained.

But something, someone, is holding me down. Holding me back. Keeping me from moving. I hear a voice but have no idea what it’s saying. I cannot comprehend the words. I only hear hums and rhythms of inflection that I assume are instructions for me that I’m choosing to ignore.

If I close my eyes and ears and hands real tight, I can shut it all out.

“You know the penalty if you fail.”

“You know the penalty if you fail.”

“You know the penalty if you fail.”

I repeat the mantra over and over again; as I always do. Reminding myself of all that could be lost if I don’t succeed.

This time it’s different. There’s an impenetrable wall in front of me. With my fists clenched, eyes shut, trying my best to block out the world around me, what’s in front of me simply will not move. The humming of the voice grows louder, deeper, the rhythms more consistent.

When I open my eyes, they are met with an icy blue stare. Intense. Focused. Strong.  I look away but they remain steady.

I look down at my feet and bite my lip, still angry at the world and all that is within and around me. When I look back up – his eyes are still watching me.

His hands are on my biceps forcefully holding me in place. Keeping me glued to my position as he demands for me to look at him. I can’t bear to hold his gaze for more than a millisecond.

I shut my eyes again trying to trick my brain into thinking of a way out. I have to run. I cannot stand still. Time is being wasted as I frantically come up with a plan for escape.

But the dull, deep, desperate rhythm of his voice lulls me out of my dark thoughts.  

“Se. Lee. Na.” The syllables of my name are chanted over and over again.

The voice is calm.

The voice is clear.

The voice is warm and inviting.

“Selena.”

Not Lilith.

“Selena.”

He’s here.

“Selena.”

It’s Rob.

My panicked search for a way out is met with his composed and kind invitation.

“Calm down. You’re okay. You’re safe. I’m with you. I’m not going anywhere.” His voice exudes confidence, trust, and care.

Could it be that in this moment, seeing his face and hearing his words, help me become no longer afraid to stay?

Is it possible that I no longer want to run?

My heart is still beating quickly, and I slowly resist the urge to bang on his chest and fight against him.

Perhaps I don’t have to stay in one place for too long, but I don’t have to leave all on my own, either.

It’s hard to be searching for something when you aren’t quite sure what you’re looking for. I knew something inside me was missing but I never really knew what exactly it was.

But now I know what I’ve been missing and simultaneously I’ve found what I’ve been searching for…

Him.

I still want to run. I still want to keep moving. I don’t want anyone or anything to ever hold me back.

I don’t know if he will be with me forever or when he will leave me – but I have him for now.

Now is all I have. Now is all we have.

And that has to be enough.

[blazerina]

omg @beastlyinstrument thank you - what an honor. I know which one I think I am but what do y’all say?!

hey i made this fanfic writer meme. drop in my ask which one u think i am!!!!

(okay to rb!)

[blazerina]

Here First (Bryce x MC)

Here First (Bryce x MC)

Word Count: 1717

A/N: I know it’s crazy to think that I’m writing about Bryce. It’s been so long since I’ve written anything! I started randomly replaying Open Heart and tried his route just for something different and I’m smitten. This is just me trying to get back in the thick of writing…I miss it! Hope all are well – sending peace and joy to this fandom and anyone who takes the time to read this! Be well. xoxo

---

Bryce fell back onto Allie’s bed with a heavy sigh.

He was tired.

He was hungry.

He was worried…and he was nervous. Two things he was not used to feeling.  

He knew he had just completed a 12-hour shift and that typically resulted in brain fog, but this was different.

His mind was reeling. Spinning.

When he heard the other interns and nurses talking about Dr. Ramsey’s dramatic announcement that Allie would be accompanying him to Miami, he had to find a supply closet to compose himself in.  He legitimately thought he might be sick.

Never before had he felt this way about anyone, and it was starting to get to him.

Why did he care that she was suddenly number 1 in the intern competition?

Why did he care that Dr. Ramsey knew her by name and no one else?

Why did he care that she would be spending not one, but two days completely alone with him?

“Ugh.” Allie huffed, obviously frustrated as she searched her closet.  Her voice interrupted Bryce’s thoughts.

“I know I’ve got one in here somewhere…”

“What are you looking for?” Bryce asked, rolling over onto his side and propping himself up on an elbow.

“A stupid formal. Ethan just emailed me that we’ll be going to a casino-themed reception. Poolside. Who wears a formal out by the pool?!” Allie hissed, picking up piles of dirty clothes and dropping them on the floor in a new location.

Bryce felt his jaw tighten thinking about one of many situations Allie would find herself in with Dr. Ramsey.  Ethan had a reputation around the hospital, for sure. But the reputation most people disdained was the one of condescension, being dressed down for mistakes and held to the highest of standards right out of the gate. This reputation was not the one that concerned Bryce the most…

He always tried hard to stay out of Dr. Ramsey’s way but had observed him enough and heard enough of his conversations with Dr. Emery to know that Ethan was a bit of a ladies’ man at times. There were rumors here and there of small insignificant relationships with interns or other attendings.  Bryce knew how many of the other female doctors and nurses found Dr. Ramsey attractive. He also knew many of the first-year interns hung on his every word hoping to impress him, to get on his good side. Bryce always shook his head at their desperate attempts, knowing they’d be willing to do anything to get attention from THE Ethan Ramsey.

Allie wasn’t like that, but that was probably the very thing that made her stand out from the rest of the intern group.  It was certainly one of the reasons Bryce was attracted to her.

Quiet confidence. Sincere care and concern for others. Brilliant skills. Modest. Respectful as well as respected. Anyone would want to be her. Anyone would want to be beside her.

Bryce wasn’t dumb. He saw the way Ramsey interacted with her, looked at her, talked to her. It was different. Different than any other intern, nurse, attending, you-name-it, that he normally interacted with.

None of that bothered Bryce until…well until…Bryce searched his mind trying to find the answer.

When was it exactly that he changed his mind about her?

When did these interactions between Allie and Ethan start to get under his skin?

He couldn’t pin-point it, but he knew that now, in this moment, he felt threatened. And he didn’t like it.

Up until recently he had been feeling confident in his feelings for her and her feelings for him. They had chemistry, they were friends, they understood each other and what they were experiencing together. It was an even push-pull relationship that left both of them satisfied in more ways than one. There was no need for a label, it was an unspoken understanding. A complicated dance that each one of them performed delicately but assertively, every day.

They were both adults. They knew what they were doing. They knew what they were getting into with one another, but they were both okay with it, even though they had never talked specifically about it.  Right? This is what Allie wanted, wasn’t it? Bryce knew he wanted it…but he started to wonder about her.

If he wanted it but she didn’t, what would that mean? Is this what happens when you get to the place where a decision must be made? Is this the feeling? Insecurity?

“Bryce?! Hello?!” Allie snapped her fingers, trying to get his attention. It was obvious he was distracted.

“Which one? The black or the purple?” She held up both her formal dress options, waiting on him to respond, completely ignorant to what he was thinking and feeling in the moment.

He swallowed hard, imagining her in either one of the gowns, being paraded around the reception on Dr. Ramsey’s arm like a trophy he had won. Bryce sat up quickly, positioning himself on the edge of the bed. He wasn’t sure how much longer he’d be able to stay in her presence without doing or saying something he’d regret.

“I like the purple.” He nodded decisively, trying to smile and use his trademark Lahela charm that oftentimes got him out of difficult situations.

“Me too.” Allie smiled, laying it on top of her open suitcase. “I think I’m almost done…” she called to him from her bathroom where she gathered some toiletries. “Then we can maybe hit up Donahue’s or something for a drink?”

“Uh, yeah, sure…” Bryce scratched the back of his head, really trying to figure out if he should say anything or not.

Allie seemed so smoothly confident in her trip. She was proud of herself for being chosen. She was chill and relaxed. He didn’t want to do anything to ruin that for her.

“Hey.” She appeared in front of him suddenly, leaning on the door frame that led into her bathroom from the bedroom.

“Are you okay?” She furrowed her brow and crossed her arms in front of her chest, sincerely concerned.

“You don’t seem okay. Did something happen today during your shift?”

Bryce immediately broke out into a wry smile. “You know nothing happens to me. I’ve got everything under control. Always.”

“Mkay.” Allie responded, moving closer to him, but still skeptical. “Do you not want to go out tonight? I know it’s already late and you’ve had a long day. You’re sweet to have sat here this long!”

She slowly sat down on his lap, placed her arms around his neck and locked eyes with him.

“I’m for sure tired but since you’re about to leave on the trip of a lifetime, I want to be sure I get some time with you.” Bryce rested his forehead against hers, his last words coming out barely above a whisper.

“I don’t know that I’d say it’s the trip of a lifetime. I’m scared out of my mind – who actually wants to spend that much time with Ethan?” Allie retorted.

“Um, a lot of people.” Bryce said, pulling away from her. “You’ve got an even bigger target on your back now, you know that right? You’re already on a first name basis with the guy and everyone’s talking about it.”

Allie nodded sadly.  “I know I should be excited, but it’s just complicated now and I’m not the same wide-eyed innocent intern I once was, you know? I’ve seen too much already…”

Bryce sighed. This was what he wanted to hear but still felt the need to say something.

His heart was beating fast, and he was trying hard to make sure what he was about to say or do was precise and well thought out. He approached everything like it was a surgery. This time though he didn’t have a mask to hide behind.

He just wasn’t sure that now was the time to try to figure out what was going on between the two of them. As much as it pained him, maybe she needed to make a choice for herself without his influence.

“I know deep down inside a part of you is stoked to go to Miami. It’s okay to celebrate, Allie. You’re kicking everyone’s ass!”

Allie searched his face and smiled slowly. “I’m proud of myself, you’re right but all this other crap that comes with it isn’t a party.  Now I’m being seen as his number one and it’s a whole new level of pressure.”

“I feel like you’re one of those people who’s always going to have options.” Bryce almost winced as he said it.

“Whatever you want you’ll be able to get.”

“Thanks…I think?” Allie laughed lightly. “That was a compliment, right?”

Her hands slid down his chest and one of them rested over his heart. She asked again, visibly concerned, “Are you sure you’re okay?”

Bryce nodded.  “Maybe I should go ahead and head out. You’ve got to meet Ramsey early in the morning to catch your flight, and I’m beat.”

Allie responded by standing up and getting off Bryce’s lap.  “Okay, if you’re sure. I’ll text you…you have to keep me updated on all the hospital gossip while I’m gone.”

“I can do that.” Bryce stretched while he stood up as well, bringing his hands over his head and stifling a yawn.

“I know it’s only for two days, and I’m being dramatic, but I AM going to miss you…” Allie sighed, moving in to give him a long hug.

Bryce felt defeated as he squeezed her tightly and gave her a light kiss on the top of her head. He didn’t dare tell her just how much he’d miss her or how she’d be all he’d think about while she was gone.

“I’ll miss you too.” He responded, as he broke away from the hug.

Heading towards the door he summoned a little bit of courage.

“When you think about those options, Allie, just remember one thing for me, okay?”

She watched him, waiting for him to finish.

“I was here for you first.”

Allie’s eyes narrowed, trying to make sense of what he was saying.

“I hope it’s a great trip and that you get everything you want. We’ll talk tomorrow.”

Hanging his head, he left quickly, afraid of what he’d see if he looked back.

[blazerina]

I’m back at it folks and have missed y’all terribly! I’m replaying Open Heart from start to finish and need to know who wants on my tag list!! I’m getting more and more inspiration as I play through it all again.

It would also help if you gave me some ideas of what kind of stories and which characters you want to read about…

[blazerina]

Surprise (Ethan x MC)

Surprise (Ethan x MC)

Word Count: 4,962 (omg that’s a lot)

Author’s Note: Okay so this is my “mature Ethan & Allie AU” where they’re already married and have been together for a little while. It eludes to some of my other Ethan & Allie stories a little bit and sets the scene for another more angsty Ethan & Allie story I plan to write soon.  I had no idea how to end this so I’m sorry if the ending stinks. Hope this brings some joy to you as you read it – thank you to all of you for your support and encouragement regarding my stories.

**This story is dedicated to @noboundariesplease who became my 800th follower a few weeks ago!!**

@parkerattano @justanotherrookie @mrswalkerwritesagain – thanks for being my fandom besties!

A few of you asked to be tagged when I posted this story so here you go:

@unusualvisionsblog @itstaygs @ethandaddyramsey @x-kyne-x @flyawayboo

Some of you liked my message about this story coming soon so I thought I’d tag you too – hope that’s okay: @queencarb @schnitzelbutterfinger @liam-kostas-wife  @keepcreative @lion-ess24 @lifeof-liv @rookieinbflat @imonlyalittledeadinside @desmaranj @havenofearoficecoldbeer

Love and hugs peace to all of you!! xoxo

--

Ding dong.

The echo of the doorbell rang out among the small, empty foyer of the two-story home that Ethan and Allie shared, just outside of Boston.  Allie was in the master bathroom, her hair in large rollers, putting the finishing touches on her makeup; mascara wand in hand.

Waiting a moment to hear if Ethan opened the door, Allie let out a sigh and rested her hand on the edge of the counter in exasperation.

“Ethan? You gonna get that?!” She hollered.

The doorbell rang again at the same moment Allie went back to applying her mascara.

“Ethan!” She yelled again, tightening the belt on her robe.

Ethan’s head popped into view behind her in the mirror. Leaning in from the doorway with the phone glued to his ear, he silently mouthed the words I’m on the phone.

Rolling her eyes, Allie put the mascara down and went quickly to the door.  A delivery man was standing on the doorstep, holding a basket full of cookies, with several colorful balloons attached.

After signing for the package and offering her thanks, Allie went immediately to the kitchen. Ethan was sitting at the table, still on the phone, looking out the window into their backyard.

“For you…” Allie smiled, placing the basket in front of him as he turned around.  

He rolled his eyes and looked for a card.  After reading it quickly, he tossed it aside, rolling his eyes again. Allie could hear the voice on the other end of the phone. This person was clearly frazzled, rambling on and talking at a rapid pace.

“I will not apologize for your lack of planning, Douglas. I have already been waiting two days beyond the deadline I originally gave you…you’re testing my patience and I already don’t have much…”

While Ethan continued on the phone, Allie poured him a glass of iced tea and set it down on the table in front of him, giving him a soft kiss on the cheek.

Ethan reached for her hand and kissed the back of it silently, looking up at her through his glasses with tired eyes.

Allie smiled and started walking backwards.  Making sure she had Ethan’s attention, she mimed at her wrist, tapping it as if a watch was there.  

“We need to go soon…” she reminded him, quietly.

Ethan nodded and then shooed her out of the room as his conversation increased his frustration.

“And I’m telling you that I will not have a diagnosis until I get those results…”

--

Allie and Ethan had been married almost 16 years now.  Their relationship had weathered many storms at this point, but their connection to one another had never been stronger or deeper. Looking at the pictures in frames throughout their house one could see how their own love and affection for one another had grown. In the pictures from their first days of being together, their eyes sparkled and glistened. Photos from their small and intimate wedding ceremony showed true joy and happiness in their smiles. As the years wore on, they included other family in their pictures, pictures of Jenner alone in a field of wildflowers, and another new puppy, Chief. Nieces and nephews and cousins galore adorned the walls and shelves of their home. In each more recent picture of their life, their eyes were just as sparkling, smiles just as happy, but their faces older and wiser, and maybe a little more tired.

The couple had been through a lot together; it seemed as though from day one they would have more than their fair share of trials and tribulations.  But through it all they managed to come out stronger with more love, devotion and appreciation for one another than either of them thought possible.

Allie was keeping an eye on the time, her stomach a bundle of nerves.  She was working hard to ensure her lipstick looked just right, while also checking every other little detail of her makeup in the mirror.

Tonight need to be as close to perfect as possible.

Downstairs, Ethan furiously ended his call and slammed his phone down on the table with more force than he intended.  He glanced quickly at the ridiculous basket and balloons, muttered a curse word under his breath and checked the time on the wall clock in the kitchen. He quickly realized he was running late and took the stairs two at a time to get changed.

Allie heard him enter their walk-in closet and called out to him.

“All done with that phone call?”

“I am.” Ethan responded, scanning his suit jackets for the one he had in mind.

“I cannot believe you made me go to the door in my robe with my hair in these curlers!” She teased, securing an earring in place.

“You can’t honestly believe that I was going to fall for that…” Ethan scoffed, talking to her through the closet as he began to change.

“Fall for what?” Allie asked, spraying perfume on her wrists and neck.

“Allie…” His tone came across as though he was admonishing her.

“I learned my lesson! I promised you that I would never, ever in the rest of our time together, try to surprise you with anything for your birthday ever again.”

“Well forgive me for being worried that someone dressed as a teddy bear or something equally as cliché and silly, was going to jump out from behind the bushes with a song and some chocolate. You’re very unpredictable, you know.”

“And you love it.” Allie retorted.

A few moments of silence passed between the two of them as Allie made her way to the closet, too. They danced around each other a few times, Ethan reaching here to grab a tie, Allie wandering over to her shoe selection, trying to decide which ones she wanted to wear.

Her eyes scanned the footwear choices before her and she mentally calculated the pros and cons of each, tilting her head in an analytical fashion, her eyes squinting as she thought to herself.

“You still have the curlers in?” Ethan questioned, almost completely dressed now, with the exception of his tie and jacket.

“I told you, I take them out at the very…last…second…” Allie reached for a pair of shoes as Ethan stopped her.

“Wear those instead…” He nodded in the direction of one shelf above the pair Allie was going for.

“Those are old!” She insisted. “You only like these because I was wearing them two years ago on our anniversary when we went to the opera and ate at the one place with the great steak and scotch – I can’t remember the name but you loved it…”

“So what if I did? It was a lovely evening and those shoes bring back good memories.”

“Maybe for you…” Allie’s eyes grew wide as she remembered the blisters they created on the heels of her feet.

She grabbed them anyway and gave him a sly grin.

“The things we do for love.”

After laying out her dress and shoes, she returned to the bathroom and started taking her hair down. Ethan was now sitting on the end of the bed, putting his shoes on, but stopped to watch her, mesmerized by her beauty.

He could only see her reflection in the mirror from the angle at which the bed was to the entrance of their master-bath, but he still couldn’t stop his own breath from catching in the back of his throat. Not a day passed when he didn’t wake up and consider himself the luckiest man on the planet.

Sure, time had weathered them both in certain ways – physically they both had more wrinkles and gray hair; but emotionally they had grown, developed and matured in their desire for one another and their need to rely on each other through all that life had thrown their way.

Ethan was not looking forward to the dinner they were attending tonight.  Allie was the magnetic one – the woman who could make the cashier at the grocery store feel like she had known her forever. Allie was the one everyone wanted to be friends with and the so-called friends the couple did have, were only tolerant of Ethan. They were really friends with her, and he knew it. She had so much that he didn’t. He was in awe of her and admired her more than she was aware.

Allie’s long reddish-brown hair tinted now with a few streaks of gray, fell from each roller, across her shoulders and down her back. The soft tendrils were exactly the way she hoped they’d be – not too tight but not too loose.  She was actually pleased with the way her look was coming together tonight. She then reminded herself that she needed to hurry.

Ethan finished putting his shoes on and straightened himself up.

“All right, I think this is as good as I’m going to get so I’ll wait downstair—”

“Wait – could you help me with my dress please?” Allie pleaded, exiting the bathroom and stepping into the closet, then emerging again with the dress already on.

She swooped her hair to one side and turned around in front of Ethan, a silent request for him to zip up the garment.

He could smell her perfume. The same perfume she had been waring for years. The scent that would forever and always remind him of her.

Without saying a word, he slowly closed the dress, his rough calloused fingers grazing across her smooth, silky skin. He lightly kissed the exposed side of her neck while running his hands up and down both of her arms. She turned around to face him and smiled.

“Please, darling. Promise me. Promise me tonight is just a dinner, our closest friends, a simple night out and NOT a birthday celebration.” His tone was soft but serious.

“You are really worried about this aren’t you?” Allie arched an eyebrow moving closer to him, her lips almost touching his.

“Allie.” Ethan sighed, eyes closing briefly. “I just don’t like surprises.  My birthday is on a Tuesday which won’t be ‘fun enough’ for you, so I’m just worried you’re trying to plan something and make it amazing. You always have good intentions, but I never react appropriately and then I feel guilty and people are watching…”

She interrupted his stream-of-consciousness speech with her lips on his. It took him a moment to kiss her back, but he quickly melted into her touch on instinct.

“I promise I have not planned a birthday-related surprise for tonight. Relax.”

He let out a shaky breath and nodded.

“Okay then.”

“Now go get in the car, I have to reapply my lipstick already, thanks to you.” She swatted his behind as he walked away and he chuckled to himself, slightly relieved.

--

“This is where we’re eating?” Ethan questioned as valet circled the car and helped Allie out of the vehicle.

“Dr. Ramsey, Dr. Valentine – we’ve been waiting for you. Right this way.” An older woman with gentle eyes and white hair led the couple through the lobby of a very fancy hotel.

Ethan felt like everyone was watching them, but he stayed focused on trying to calm his own nerves. He wanted to trust Allie and not be paranoid about some crazy birthday plan, but he couldn’t help himself.

Allie held his hand and smiled at everyone that passed by.  Her heart was beating fast too.  Ethan could feel the pulse in her wrist as he clutched onto her for dear life.

“Ethan…” She whispered, “Are you okay?”

He didn’t respond, his gaze fixed ahead of him, following the woman to a huge ballroom full of banquet tables. When the doors opened Ethan felt light-headed. Not one seat was empty.

Music was playing and there was a stage set up at the front of the room. The room was beautifully decorated and whoever planned whatever event Ethan found himself attending, obviously spared no expense. People had just begun to eat their plated dinners. It seemed as though a few less people paid attention to him now that he was safely inside the room.

His emotions were a mixture of relief and confusion.  

Allie’s voice coaxed him out of his own thoughts.

“See?! Told ya. Nothing birthday related!” She kept hold of his hand and led him to a table closer to the front, where two seats had clearly been reserved for them.

Naveen and Harper were already at the table along with the chairman of Edenbrook’s Board of Director’s and the President of the hospital.

“I was wondering how late you’d be tonight, Ethan.  The table was taking bets before you walked in with this lovely young woman on your arm. Does Allie know?”

Ethan pulled the chair out for Allie and relaxed a little more, now that he was around familiar faces. He still didn’t quite have any idea what was going on.

“Ha-ha.” Allie chimed in sarcastically, leaning over to Naveen and kissing him on the cheek.

“Lovely to see you all this evening – thank you for coming.” She added.

“No, my dear, thank YOU for making this event possible.” The chairman spoke up, nodding towards Ethan.

“If it weren’t for Dr. Valentine, we’d only see Ramsey here walking the halls of the hospital day and night. He’d have no real life to speak of!” Naveen teased.

As the table made feeble attempts at small talk with one another, people would come up to Ethan every so often and shake his hand or clap him on the back, telling him how good it was to see him here or offering their most sincere congratulations. Ethan tried his best to be polite but was quite frankly starting to get a little annoyed. He was hungry and irritable and already wanted to be left alone.

He always felt so awkward and out of place at these things.  He never knew what to say or precisely how to act. Charming people and making idle conversation with them was not his strong suit. It was entirely out of his comfort zone. And what was worse, tonight, he clearly was already supposed to know what event he was attending or at the very least what was going on, however, he really had no clue.

Obviously there was no way that the Dr. Ethan Ramsey was about to admit to a table full of his medical peers, that he did not know what was happening or exactly what they were gathered together to celebrate tonight. To appear as though he had no answers was the worse possible fate he could imagine.

“Allie…” he whispered sweetly into her ear, placing his hand on her upper thigh, below the table.

“What exactly is going on? Help me out here…”

“Allie! I feel as though it has been forever since I’ve seen you!” Harper gushed, clearly, she had already had a few drinks and was feeling quite conversational.

“It has been!” Allie engaged with her but then quickly responded to Ethan between talking with Harper and the rest of the table.

“You’ll see.” She pecked him quickly on the lips leaving him stunned and puzzled. He could not for the life of him figure out what any of this had to do with him.

Allie knew he’d never ask anyone else at the table what was going on. She had him right where she wanted him. He knew it too and he hated her for it.

As hard as he tried not to get mad, he felt anger rising in his chest. He always struggled when he didn’t feel in control. When two plus two didn’t add up to be four, he had a very difficult time adjusting. Everyone was being nice to him, everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves.

Was this some kind of party?

Ethan took a few shallow breaths and pushed through, talking to those around him and grasping for Allie every chance he got, in a respectful and not attention-seeking way. Little touches here and there left her connected to him. She was what kept him grounded and he needed her desperately tonight.

He was continuing to get old. He saw it in the mirror as it reflected his own face every single day. This birthday coming up was just another reminder of how much life had been lived. The depth of the few relationships he had and the stark reminder of what he lacked, always hit him square on, around this time of year. Birthdays were not and never would be his favorite.

Dramatically, he began thinking of how betrayed he felt by Allie. She had duped him once again and led him on. How could she promise him she hadn’t done anything when clearly this whole thing had been executed flawlessly? She was too smart. She knew he wouldn’t blow up on her here, in front of people.  

He then began looking around at the decorations, the food, the stage, this lavish hotel he’d only been in once before, and the dollar signs began adding up in his mind. Now suddenly worried about how much she had spent on this over-the-top soiree, he needed to excuse himself and go get some air.

He slowly released his grasp on Allie’s hand, and sheepishly removed himself from the table.

“Ethan, no. Sit down. You can’t…you can’t leave right now.” Allie smiled as she instructed him, but her tone was serious.

“Alexandra, what in God’s name is going on? This is ridiculous that I cannot even…” Ethan was interrupted by a man on stage and he quickly took his seat, not wanting to make a scene.

Through clenched teeth, he leaned over to Allie once again.

“You promised me.” He hissed, beginning to seethe with anger. He thought after all this time she would know him better than this.

“Is a slideshow of my life going to start playing soon? Clowns and confetti coming through in a second? All these people?! Allie, come on!”

“Hush.” She put a finger to his lips, remaining calm. “Pay attention.”

“…it is with that in mind that we take time tonight to pay honor to a man who really needs no introduction…”

“Is that the Governor of Massachusetts?”  Ethan gawked. “You got the governor…”

“Put these on.” Allie slid his glasses over to him with a smile. “Yes, that’s the governor. Now hush and listen.”

Ethan was totally put out at this point, but put his glasses on and sat back in his chair. He was frustrated. His leg was bobbing up and down unconsciously. He had nervous energy. He wanted to leave. He wanted to get up and run out the door. He mentally noted the exits in the room. How fast could he make it? He was a little sore from his run earlier this morning but with this much adrenaline, surely, he could…

“Leading the nationally renowned diagnostics team at Edenbrook hospital has been the bulk of his responsibility for the last 25 years. Under his leadership, this team has brought great prestige and esteem to Edenbrook, to Boston and to the Commonwealth of Massachusetts.  Not to mention the incredible notoriety and hundreds of millions of dollars of revenue that we have all benefitted from, due to his excellent work.”

Ethan paused, sitting up straighter, starting to put the pieces together.

“His colleagues from across the country have gathered here tonight to celebrate his contributions to the medical field, but tonight I want to celebrate his contributions to our state and to our community. There will be time for more accolades as the evening continues but first, and foremost, let us celebrate him and hear what he has to say.”

Allie squeezed his hand again, beaming with pride.

“Ladies and gentlemen, it is my distinct honor, pleasure and privilege to be able to introduce you to our guest of honor tonight. Please join me in congratulating this year’s recipient of the Massachusetts Medical Society Lifetime Achievement Award, Dr. Ethan Ramsey of Edenbrook Hospital.

The room erupted in applause with some people whooping and hollering. Immediately everyone sprang to their feet, even Ethan. For a moment he wasn’t sure if he had to go on stage or not, but it became clear that there was an award he needed to accept and most likely a speech that would been expected.

Stunned and feeling as though he was floating on air, he quickly made his way up to the stage, hoping no one could see that his hands were shaking a bit. He shook hands with the governor, took his award in both hands and immediately looked out among the crowd.

Ethan tried to scan the faces, wanting to soak in this moment – he was stunned and still unsure if he was really awake.  While he tried to focus on the faces and really see who it was who had come out to support him, his gaze was instantly drawn to one and only one person in the room.

Allie wiped tears away from her eyes quickly, wanting to keep her emotions at bay. The only thing she felt in this moment was immense pride, and maybe a little bit of satisfaction in pulling this over on her beloved.  Standing and still applauding, she looked up at him in awe. Awe that he was hers. Not that his accomplishments and professional achievements weren’t worthy – but the only thing he was to her in that moment was Ethan. Her husband. The love of her life.

“Please.” Ethan cleared his throat as he spoke into the microphone, both his heart and mind racing.

“This is quite enough, please sit.” He instructed a little more forcefully.  

Allie led the group in finding their seats as a hush fell over the crowd, waiting to hear from the man they were all there to honor.

“I know this will come as a shock to most of you who know me well, especially those who work with me on a daily basis…but I’m finding myself speechless at the moment…”

Ethan chuckled as did the rest of the room.  He bit his lip, locking eyes with Allie and shaking his head, grinning and smirking, a combination of the two.

“I had no idea, absolutely no clue that this was happening tonight. I’m blown away by your support and your presence here tonight. I…uh…” He cleared his throat again, then looked back out into the audience.

He found Allie’s eyes, and also his words again.

“I do not take this award lightly and it truly means so much to me. I don’t know that I like the fact that I’m old enough now to be receiving lifetime achievement awards, but I am grateful, really. I love what I do, I’m fortunate to have a wonderful job that keeps me guessing every single day; really great co-workers, at least most of the time…” Again, the audience laughed.

“I get to teach med students in their first years of residency, and then you know, help save people’s lives. It’s actually surreal that this is the life I get to live.”

Ethan took a deep breath, biting his lip and trying to measure out his next statements carefully.

“As great as all of that is, I know that there is absolutely no possible way for me to be standing before you tonight as the person that I am today, without the love, devotion and care of my wife, Allie Valentine. She’s my Rookie.”

He paused, looking down, one hand finding his heart as he became overcome with emotion. He took several seconds to gather himself, he wanted to stay composed.

“I was actually pretty upset with her tonight for dragging me here and not telling me what the hell was going on. Even though all the things that have been written about me and said about me are true, and my accomplishments have garnered our entire team with a lot of recognition and such, I am most proud of being her husband.

Why she chose to settle down with a grumpy old man like me, I’ll never fully understand…but everything I am and everything I have today is completely because of her faith in me and her ability to make me the best possible version of myself.

When we met, I thought I would be the one teaching her everything she needed to know, but in the end, she has taught me more than I ever taught her.”

Allie’s eyes were filled with tears, she could hardly look at him without feeling as though she was going to burst with pride. She blew him a kiss from her seat and wiped away more tears, not daring to let them fall down her cheeks and ruin the makeup she tried so hard to perfect earlier that evening.

“I feel like I’m Rambling Ramsey up here so I’ll wrap this up - I could go on all night telling you about what Mrs. Ramsey means to me, what this award means to me, but I’ll stop here. Thank you again and please, I want to work the room as they say and thank all of you personally so come find me and…really, sincerely, this means so much to me. Thank you.”

Before he knew it, Ethan was swept away for pictures, people swarming around him, talking to him, handing him scotch after scotch, as it was well-known to be his drink of choice. It felt like at least an hour before he made his way back to Allie. She had just finished speaking with the Governor, when Ethan snuck up behind her.

Immediately, she turned and wrapped her arms around him.  

“Happy Birthday, my love!” She whispered in his ear.

“I cannot believe you did this to me…” He said seriously, looking in her eyes. “I hope you know you’re going to get it when we get home.” Ethan teased.

Laughing, Allie picked her glass of Prosecco from the table and raised it towards him in a mock toast as she wiggled her eyebrows and walked towards the open bar.

“Was already planning on it…” She muttered under her breath as she watched him walk away.

“I heard that…” He called out over his shoulder.

--

Throughout the night each one of them independently visited with people, giving them their sincere thanks and letting them know how meaningful it was to share this evening with them. Every few minutes or so Ethan would find Allie or Allie would find Ethan and they’d give each other a quick squeeze of the hand or a kiss on the cheek as they brushed passed each other and moved on to the next well-wisher.

“I don’t know what she sees in you…” Naveen said to Ethan as he took a swig from a beer bottle, nodding towards Allie who was across the room. “She’s perfect.”

“No doubt about it, I’m the lucky one.” Ethan agreed as Allie sauntered over to the two of them.

“This cannot be good.” She laughed, pointing at them both.  “What are you plotting?”

“You’re the schemer.” Naveen chided. “No one could have pulled this off better, my queen.”

Naveen pretended to bow before her with both arms raised above his head while he bent at the waist.

“Oh stop.” Allie waved him off.

“It looks like this crowd is thinning out and if I stay in these shoes much longer my feet will need to be amputated.”

She leaned on Ethan, stifling a yawn.  

“I know a guy who can help with that…” Naveen offered, finishing his drink.

“You really know how to throw a birthday party!” He added, following Ethan and Allie out to the valet line for the cars.

“It wasn’t a birthday party!” Both Ethan and Allie said in unison, Allie’s brow furrowed in mock anger.

Naveen begged for forgiveness and said his goodbyes while the couple waited for their vehicle to be brought around. As they sunk into the vehicle, beyond tired, Allie immediately kicked off her heels and Ethan loosened his tie. He threw his jacket into the backseat along with Allie’s shoes and rolled down the windows a bit for fresh air.

“Before we get going…” Allie put her hand on his as it rested on the gearshift.

“I know I said no more surprises – but you can’t be mad at me because this technically wasn’t a birthday surprise it was a general surprise and I knew that if you knew they were giving you an award you’d come up with some excuse not to go and I just couldn’t live with myself if you didn’t get a chance to hear all these people tell you how amazing you are because I know you’re amazing and I tell you all the time but sometimes you don’t believe me.”

She stopped to take a quick breath.

“So, I hope that tonight you know just how many people agree with me that you’re incredible – so please, please don’t be mad. I don’t want to ride all the way home with you in silence because I pulled one over on you.”

“Whoa. Allie. Calm down.” Ethan reached out to her and held her face in his hand.

“I’m not mad. It was a great surprise and…”

He reached across the console and kissed her hard, passionately, with so much force that his lips burned her skin.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” She whispered.

He laced his hand into hers and held it all the way home, staying the way they had been all the years of their relationship and even in little moments all night long…connected, grateful and in awe that somehow, someway they had found each other and were never ever letting go.

[blazerina]

Always (Ethan x MC)

friends - sorry for my absence - i’ve been missing you all but trying my best to take care of myself during this crazy time in life. i hope you all have been doing the same! i’ve been pretty sad with the current state of events in this world and definitely retreated from a lot. i’m trying to get back to writing - i owe you all a series that @parkerattano and i promised you all. shout out to her for helping me get back to writing, at least a little bit. she told me to post this, so here it is.  be well everyone!

--

Ethan slammed the door, throwing his keys on the kitchen counter, yelling fiercely for Allie.  He began pacing in the kitchen, his hands on his hips, his lab coat still on. It had been a long time since he felt this angry.

Allie appeared, obviously frazzled and frantic, “What is it? Are you okay? What’s going on?”

“They did it. Those bastards actually did it.”

He spit the words out of his mouth one by one as if they themselves were venom-filled.  He could feel his own heart rate and he knew he needed to calm down, but this was betrayal as far as he was concerned. Loyalty had been shattered and trust broken. This meant war.

“The clinical trials – they went ahead and moved forward. I told them not to. We have been working on this project for years and the minute they get the green light, they go on in?!”

Allie sidled up to the bar, pulled out a stool and watched him as he continued to pace, his legs and lips moving more slowly as he spoke. After a few minutes, she went to the fridge and got him a bottle of sparkling water.

“Here.”

Ethan used the bottle opener to remove the top and took a long drink.  He paused, staring at the floor then looked up to meet Allie’s gaze.

“The drug’s not ready. People are going to die. It’s not a question. And they. Don’t. Care.”

Allie shook her head and crossed her arms in front of her chest. She was just as disappointed as Ethan. He had been working with this group of doctors, researchers, and scientists for years and this news while upsetting, was not all that surprising.

The couple stood in the kitchen in silence for a bit. Allie didn’t know what to say and didn’t want to accidentally provoke more of Ethan’s righteous anger. Ethan stared out the window overlooking their backyard as he continued to sip on his water.

After a few moments, Allie moved behind Ethan, wrapped her arms around his waist and stood on her tiptoes to hug him from behind.

“They want me out.” Ethan whispered.  “I’m costing them money because I want to do what is right and they want me off the team.”

Allie took a step back as Ethan turned to face her.

“What?” She questioned, narrowing her eyes.

“I think it’s time I quit.”

“Ethan, you’re upset and angry and rightfully so, but making a decision in the heat of the moment is not wise. Control what you can control, remember? We say it a hundred times a day in this house. You have worked so hard on this…”

He held up his hand to stop her mid-sentence.

“No, I mean, quit this. All of this. Medicine. For real this time. Basically retire, early.”

Allie couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Sure, they’d been together for a while now and he was quote, unquote "older" but he wasn’t that old.

“I don’t know, Ethan…” she whispered, her brain was suddenly on over-drive.

“I do. Now is the time. I always knew it would be clear to me when it was supposed to happen.” He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

He knew she was right. He was upset. He was angry. He had been tired and stressed for months on end. This was not the time to make a big decision, but he could not deny how he felt.

If this was the future of medicine, if he was being pushed out and not respected or looked to as the leader of his research teams, then he saw no other option but to leave and move on.

“We need to get out of here. Are you working this weekend?”

“No. No – I’m off this weekend, actually.” Allie replied quietly, still stunned.

She made her way back to the kitchen to busy herself with unloading the dishwasher, so she didn’t say something she’d later regret. It was almost time for dinner, and she’d be able to start cooking soon.

“Why don’t we head on up to the lake? We can rest in our cabin…take it easy…we need a vacation. Both of us do.”

Ethan was quite a homebody and did not like to venture out much. He knew that Allie much preferred the beach to the lake, but this was better than nothing, especially with it being such a last-minute plan. He wanted to be somewhere he could breathe and think clearly.

“Sounds great.” Allie smiled tightly, then returned her focus on stacking plates in the cabinet.

“Good.  I’ll tell Banerji I’m not coming in the rest of the week and that will give me time to get the car washed, packed and ready for the trip.”

He could tell she was tense, and he knew he had just given her an immense amount to think about. Even though they had been married for a while now he did at times forget that everything he did affected someone else’s life too, not just his own.

Ethan moved into the kitchen and tossed his bottle in the recycle, then peeled off his coat, forgetting in the midst of his tirade that he still had it on.

“Hey.” He said, pulling Allie closer to him. “Do not worry about this, okay? It’s going to be all right.”

She curled into him and nodded her head.  “I know.”

Allie tried to sound reassuring, but she couldn’t imagine what life would look like if Ethan was no longer a doctor; no longer practicing medicine, and that scared her to death.

--

The couple’s weekend at the lake was exactly the kind of R&R that they needed. They read books for pleasure, cooked together and spent lazy afternoons outside in hammocks or on the dock fishing.

When it came to their last night at the cabin, the two of them sat on that same dock, swinging their legs back and forth as they dangled over the edge. Allie had her head on Ethan’s shoulder as they shared a bottle of wine, watching the sun go down.

Ethan was first to break the comfortable silence.

“You know I’ve been thinking about it this whole time…” he said carefully, as he broached the topic of his retirement.

“Mmhmm.” Allie cooed in agreement.

“I think I’m ready. I’m just really ready to try something new. To leave Edenbrook behind and see what else is out there.”

Allie turned to face him and kissed him quickly, but sweetly.

“I know you are. And I support whatever final decision you make. I’d follow you anywhere. I hope you know that.”

“I do.” He exhaled with a loud sigh. “But maybe now it’s time for the other Dr. Ramsey to have the limelight, you know?”

She laughed a little, taking a sip of her wine. “I’m still Dr. Valentine, thank you very much. Only Dr. or Mrs. Ramsey to y-o-u.”

Allie poked her finger into his chest as she spelled it out.

“What on earth are you going to do with all your spare time, though…besides drive me crazy?” She asked, earnestly.

“Oh, don’t worry – I’ll have plenty to do.  I can do my own research, I can teach, I can speak at other hospitals or universities…I can write…I’ve always wanted to write a medical mystery novel.”

“Yes, I know. I’ve heard all about 'Dr. Brown and the case of the black lung.' Not sure that will ever be put in print, but we can always try!” She teased.

“I’ll still be driving you crazy, though.” Ethan looked down at her with the sideways smile-slash-smirk that had made her swoon the very moment she met him.

Looking up into his piercing blue eyes Allie pulled his face closer to hers and whispered, “Always.”

Sharing a kiss at sunset, they both felt at peace not knowing exactly what the future would bring, but thankful to know that no matter what, they always had each other.

[blazerina]

Ethically Questionable // Open Heart AU // Chapter 1

Miami Heat // Ethan x Maggie (MC)

Word Count: 4458

A/N: This is chapter one of our Ethically Questionable AU that @parkerattano & I dreamt up late one evening. I literally thought I dreamt the conversation when I talked with her about it the next morning. Check out the moodboard below that she put together – isn’t she amazing? Mad props to her because all of this is pretty much her idea, I’m just putting a few words out there to help everyone else get to experience this amazing HC of hers. There is plenty more to come and we are just getting started with the drama. We’ve hyped it up a lot because we are Tumblr besties and super excited but we really do think you’ll enjoy the ride too!

Check out our hype posts HERE,  & HERE.

Let us know what you think – chapter two will be coming soon!

EQ AU tag list: @mvalentine​ / @choicesobsessedd​ / @dulcehernandez​ / @missmiimiie​ / @edgiestwinter​ / @junehiratas​ / @binny1985​ / @datynasuha​ / @unluckygs / @trinittyy​ / @lilyvalentine​ / @honeyandsunfl0wers​ / @lucy-268​ / @choices-love-affair​ / @parkerattano / @queencarb / @custaroonie / @mkamra2355 / @humanpokemon / @ramseysno1rookie /@unknowntimelady / @myusualnerdyself / @schnitzelbutterfinger / @mvalentine / @jasminedayz / @thanialis / @tefigranger / @kenzierookie / @justanotherrookie / @keepcreativechoices / @heauxplesslydevoted / @ethandaddyramsey / @kaavyaethanramsey / @sherlockedmcu / @edith-eggs1 / @noboundariesplease / @edgiestwinter / @danysims4cc / @tempesreture / @unusualvisionsblog / @chasingrobbie / @mapipa / @lifeof-liv / @3riche-blog / @anonymous2094 / @annaidziaszczyk / @ntoraplayschoices / @jessirosebud / @mskinkyafro / @caseyvalentineramsey /@desmaranj / @trappedinfandoms / @lucy-268 /

*If you asked to be on my Ethan tag list, I just added you here -- but let me know if you wish to be removed! Or added in that case!*

“A world-renowned doctor at a top hospital thinks you’re the best intern. Most people would kill to be you.”

Bryce’s words from yesterday echoed loudly in Maggie’s head as she stared out the window of the plane on the way to Miami. She could hardly contain her excitement. He thinks I’m the best intern…she thought to herself as she replayed her conversation with Bryce for the thousandth time. Dr. Ramsey had chosen her.  That meant he saw something in her.  To him, she was already special.  Now, she just needed to capitalize on it.

On the outside, of course, she was trying to present herself to Dr. Ramsey as a polished, professional, put-together intern – but on the inside she was bubbling over with enthusiasm for this quick two-day trip.

Maggie truly felt like the luckiest girl in the world.  This hard-working, smart-mouthed kid from upstate New York was selected by her mentor and current crush, Dr. Ethan Ramsey.  He had been the whole reason she wanted to become a doctor in the first place.  In her freshman AP Biology class when her teacher, Mrs. Hart, asked the class to read one of his journal articles for extra-credit, she Googled him immediately, wanting to digest as much information about him as possible.

Her friends would tease her about the fact that instead of teen heartthrob pictures posted on the inside of her locker, she had medical journal titles and Dr. Ramsey quotes. No one understood her high esteem and true admiration for him. She was confident when she applied to medical school that she would be competitive at Edenbrook, but she felt even more confident as of late. Now that she was number one and Dr. Ramsey’s clear favorite, everything was right in her world. The only thing that would make it better would be a searing gaze, a brush of his fingertips, hearing Dr. Ramsey call her by name and not “Valentine” or “Rookie…”  

She was daydreaming again as she watched the snow-white clouds dance along the deep blue sky. The plane was about 30 minutes from landing. She was able to finally admit to herself that she had butterflies in her stomach.  Could it be true that she had caught Dr. Ramsey looking at her differently lately? Had he actually started to smile a bit when he saw her for rounds every morning? Could it be that she was impressing him not only with her intellect but with her physical assets too? Is there any chance he could, maybe be, attracted to her?

Maggie’s imagination got carried away, thinking about this conference. She’d at least get to share a meal or two with him, maybe there would be a chance for them to get dressed up. Maggie planned ahead and brought a killer dress for just that kind of opportunity. She would make sure Dr. Ramsey got to see even more of her, um, “assets” and she’d get to see what makes him tick outside of the stuffy hospital. They’d dance alone on the beach; he’d declare his never-ending love for her and then at sunset they’d kiss…

“Aaahhh!” she let out a soft cry of surprise as the plane suddenly lurched up and down. Maggie reached for the armrest to clutch it tightly, forgetting that Dr. Ramsey was seated next to her, and his hand was already occupying the space between them.

In an instant her hand grasped his as her eyes grew wide, not because of the turbulence but because of the feel of his skin on hers. Something she had only dreamed about up until this very moment.

He had been reading and with his free hand removed his glasses, staring at her with a questioning look upon his face.

“Maggie.” He stated, matter-of-factly, but Maggie swore he said it breathlessly.

“Maggie.” He repeated.

“Yes, Dr. Ramsey?” She looked deep into his eyes now, hoping her longing and desire for him was evident in her eyes too.

“May I have my hand back, please?”

She immediately released her hold and smiled sheepishly. The Ethan Ramsey smirk appeared on his face briefly as she pulled her hand away.

“Of course.”

When he spoke to her, she hung on his every word, no matter what it was he was saying. However, Maggie had learned by now to keep her answers short and to the point.

“Thank you again for asking me to accompany you on this trip, Dr. Ramsey.  It’s my first large conference and I know we’re going to have a wonderful time! I’m thankful, truly, I am.” She smiled, trying to make things less awkward.

“Yes, yes. So you’ve said. No less than a dozen times now.  And as I have said before, don’t thank me, just do what you’re told. This is a work trip not a vacation. You’d do well to remember that fact, Dr. Valentine.”

The way he slowly emphasized Dr. Valentine sent shivers down Maggie’s spine. Did he know what he was doing to her? It was little lines like this, where the tone and pace of his voice changed, that made her think – no, believe – that he was indeed beginning to develop feelings for her.

Maggie nodded and returned her gaze to the window as he pulled his hand off the armrest. He cleared his throat as he settled back into the chair, recoiling a bit and trying to focus again on his reading material. Soon they’d be on land once more. If Maggie wanted any semblance of a decent relationship with Dr. Ramsey, she’d have to take advantage of opportunities to remind him that she wasn’t just THE number one intern. She was HIS number one intern.  She decided for now to keep her mouth shut and continue to stare at the sky. It was safer that way.

--

When she had to tell Dr. Ramsey that they messed up on the reservations and only had one room for the two of them to share, she delivered the news matter-of-factly as if she was sharing the status of a broken arm or an appendicitis diagnosis. There was no flare, no pomp and circumstance, just the facts.  

She was looking forward to it and would make sure Dr. Ramsey didn’t regret it, but she knew that she had to present her case clearly and without emotion in order to keep anything from changing too much.

“They only have reservations under your name.  One room. We’ll have to share.”

Maggie was quite pleased with herself and the way she tackled what could have been a nightmare situation.

“Morons. Can no one do anything right?” He clenched his fist and his jaw while simultaneously rolling his eyes.

“I promise I don’t snore…” Maggie offered, trying to lighten the mood that had suddenly become very tense.

“I just don’t like the way it looks.” He explained with a heavy sigh, “But, we’ll have to make it work.”

They took their luggage up to the room. As they entered, Maggie did her best to keep the amount of awe she felt, to a minimum as she took in the sight of the beautiful balcony and the scenic view of the ocean and beach below. She immediately went out to look over it all. It wasn’t until Dr. Ramsey called her back in that she realized there really was only one bed.

“We need to go speak with some vendors and make the rounds on the exhibition floor.” Dr. Ramsey explained, checking his watch.

“Sounds fun!” Maggie smiled as she clasped her hands together, clearly delighted.

“You are woefully misinformed. Nothing about this is fun, Rookie.”

“There’s a first time for everything, Dr. Ramsey.”

“Meaning?”

“Maybe you’ll actually have fun this time because you’re with me.”

Maggie tried to be subtle in her tone but gave him a wink and then smiled through one side of her mouth as she boldly approached him and looped her arm under his.

She gently pushed him alongside her to the door of their hotel room.

“I should have asked Harper to pay for an assistant instead of bringing you…don’t get any ideas.” He raised an eyebrow and down on her with mock disdain.

The energy between them had shifted now and as he looked at her with mischief in his eyes, she wanted to reach up right then, snake her arms around his neck and toss him on the bed. The expo vendors be damned! But she swallowed those thoughts away and promised him she wouldn’t.

“I’ll be on my best behavior…for now.”

Maggie offered, followed by a throaty chuckle that made Dr. Ramsey stop in his tracks.

He turned sharply to look at his reflection in the full-length mirror near the door of their room. Maggie studied him as he studied himself.  

The hair. Those eyes. His lips. Everything about this man was sexy. It didn’t matter that he was 10 plus years older than her. His brain, his body, all of him was exactly what she wanted.

There were so many rumors about what Dr. Ramsey was really like.  People said he was vain, arrogant, selfish, rude and cocky as hell.  But she had yet to really see that side of him. Sure, he was particular and liked things done a certain way, but it was all for the good of the hospital, the patients and his team. He had a right to be that way, he’d earned it. He was after all, the Doctor Ethan Ramsey.

Those three words had rattled around in her brain for years.  Doctor.  Ethan. Ramsey.  He was everything she hoped to be and also everything she wanted at the same time.  He was standing right in front of her; she still felt at times as though she should pinch herself. It was truly a dream come true to be able to be in the presence of her mentor day after day.

“Like what you see Rookie? Let’s go.” He ushered her out the door and she nodded in agreement while biting her lip, wondering just where the rest of this day and this trip would lead them.

--

Dr. Ramsey and Maggie were able to spend some time both together and apart in the vendor area of the exhibit hall.  The bright white lights pierced Maggie’s eyes and started to give her a headache. She went from booth to booth listening to people as they peddled their latest technology to either aid in surgeries, help make diagnoses or, some would claim, cure the rarest sicknesses. Maggie was surprised at the wide range of options being offered and just how far these companies and salespeople would go to try and get her, a lowly intern, to agree to use their product. She was actually glad that she didn’t have the power or authority to tie Edenbrook to some of these companies. It was overwhelming to say the least.

Maggie found Dr. Ramsey waiting for her at their predetermined location. They split up for a little bit to “make the rounds” and decided to meet back up after about 45 minutes out on the floor. She was desperately trying to keep a headache at bay but must have been showing signs of fatigue on her face.

“Are you all right?” Dr. Ramsey asked, appearing genuinely concerned.

She nodded slowly and smiled, wanting to appear strong and capable at all times, but especially in front of him.

“Oh yes, just a slight headache is all. Once I get some water and a couple ibuprofen, I’ll be fine.”

“Let’s get out of here. We need you feeling better before the reception this evening.”

“Reception?” Maggie questioned.

Before she could ask more questions, she was interrupted by a strikingly beautiful blonde who approached Dr. Ramsey from behind, placing a hand on his shoulder. It didn’t take long for Maggie to realize she was watching something very intriguing unfold right before her eyes.

“Isabelle?” Dr. Ramsey’s eyes grew wide, turning around and enveloping the mystery woman in a hug.  

A long hug.

A hug that lasted for what felt like five minutes.

Maggie felt a sudden pang of jealousy. Dr. Ramsey clearly knew this woman. She was beautiful and he seemed happy to see her.

“It’s been a long time.”

Isabelle, as he called her, responded in a more abrupt manner than Maggie expected.  She noticed her body language and was immediately confused. Isabelle’s arms were crossed in front of her chest and she seemed less than pleased with Dr. Ramsey’s greeting.

“Yes, it has. Too long, Ethan, if you ask me.”

“How long has it been, exactly?”

Maggie assumed Dr. Ramsey was trying this hardest to be charming. He was smiling not only with his mouth but with his eyes. She couldn’t be sure, but it seemed as though his eyes were also travelling the length of Isabelle’s body as they exchanged words.

“I believe it was last year’s conference. Don’t tell me you don’t remember.”

Isabelle purred like a luxurious cat, still looking a bit stand-offish, but clearly remembering or feeling something for Maggie’s beloved mentor.

“Oh, I remember…things just get busy and life takes over once we’re off conference time, you know.”

“I had heard a lot about you before…that night…” Isabelle leaned in, closer to him, the last few words barely above a whisper.

Maggie was feeling more than awkward in this moment. She was torn between wanting to distract herself and also wanting to hear every bit of this exchange.  This was juicy information and she needed to know who the heck this woman was and what history she had with Dr. Ramsey.

After letting out a loud and uncomfortable laugh, Ethan focused again on Isabelle and took her hand in his.

“I suppose I should be flattered. Usually at these things people either hate me or want something from me.”

“Well I was definitely one of the many women who wanted something from you. And there are plenty more who would want something from you too...”

At this point, Maggie noticed Isabelle’s eyes wandering to where she was standing. The two women made eye contact while Maggie shifted uncontrollably.  

Dr. Ramsey came to her rescue, swooping in beside Maggie and introducing her.

“Ah yes, Dr. Isabelle Crane, this is Dr. Maggie Valentine. Edenbrook’s finest intern, ranked number one currently. She’s accompanied me to the symposium this year.”

“And I do mean finest…” He whispered quickly and breathlessly into Maggie’s ear as she reached forward to extend her hand to Isabelle.  

She wanted to do a double take; her mind not completely sure she had heard Dr. Ramsey correctly. Instead she focused on the woman in front of her, hoping this exchange would end quickly.

Isabelle looked Maggie up and down then licked her lips and smiled deviously. Her eyes flicked from the doctor back to the intern. Maggie could almost see the wheels turning in this Isabelle woman’s head – she didn’t mind where she thought it was going but found it to be a little unprofessional.

“Well,” Isabelle cleared he throat, again her eyes playing ping pong between the two doctors. “Let me offer you this word of advice, number one intern...”

Maggie swallowed hard, her eyes locking with Isabelle’s. She was suddenly very afraid of what Isabelle was going to say next.

“Take great care to not let this one get away. It’s been my experience that once he’s out of sight, you’re out of mind.”

Isabelle was terse and made it beyond clear that she was unhappy with Dr. Ramsey’s behavior. Maggie wasn’t sure she wanted to know exactly what went on between the two of them, but she was astute enough to get the gist. She watched, keeping her composure, as Isabelle spun on her heel and quickly exited.

Wanting to break the ice and let her mentor know she wasn’t the least bit phased by anything, Maggie was the first to speak.

“I think I’ll go get that ibuprofen now.”

Dr. Ramsey was scratching the back of his neck, his head hung low. He looked up at her with a sheepish grin.

“Yeah. Good idea.”

--

By the time Dr. Ramsey returned to the room, Maggie was in the shower. She had laid out her dress for the evening, hoping it was right for the occasion. The last thing she wanted was to be too dressed up or not dressed up enough. She was well aware of who she was with and she did not want to disappoint him in any way.

It wasn’t long before she heard Dr. Ramsey’s voice call out over the noise of the water.  She knew he was back in the room when she heard the loud hotel door slam close. Thankfully there was no way he could enter the bathroom, as she had thought ahead and locked it.  She already had her fill of awkward encounters for the day.

“Maggie?”

She swallowed hard, her cheeks turning a light shade of pink. She could feel her neck and chest flush a little bit upon the realization that the only thing between her naked body and Dr. Ethan Ramsey was a flimsy hotel wall. And what’s more, he knew it too, and still chose to engage with her. Trying her best not to come across too hopeful or excited, she casually responded.

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry for all that back there…I know you may…uh…have some questions but she’s…”

Maggie cut him off, not wanting or needing an explanation.

“It’s fine, Dr. Ramsey. Really!”

She began to wash her hair, biting her lip and closing her eyes wondering where this conversation would go next.

“I know you might need the shower, so I’ll be fast. I’m just finishing up!” She lied.

“Oh, um, okay. No rush.”

Maggie noticed his voice had gotten lower and a little more raspy with that response. Could it be possible that he was thinking the same thing she was? There was no way he wasn’t thinking about her being in the shower as he spoke with her WHILE SHE WAS IN THE SHOWER.

“How’s your head?” He asked plainly.

Maggie had now put her head under the water to rinse. “Oh, it’s much better, thank you.”

“Is this – this dress here on the bed, is this what you’re wearing tonight?”

She cursed herself, unsure of his tone.

“I brought a lot of options. I wasn’t sure how fancy this was, and I can do something different if it’s not that kind of reception.”

She was finished with her shower now and had turned off the water, wrapping a towel around herself quickly. Her heart was beating fast indicating she was nervous, but her mind was fixed on him and she also felt daring. She wondered if it was possible to be both at the same time.  

“It’s sufficient.” Dr. Ramsey responded in typical fashion.

With her hair dripping wet, she decided to go for it. He wasn’t stupid and neither was she. If anything, she could play it off like an honest mistake. But she wanted him. And she wanted him to know she wanted him. Coming out of the bathroom in just a towel would definitely send that message.

She opened the door and wasn’t prepared for him to be right there, but he was. Literally a few inches from her. She couldn’t keep her eyes off of his lips. She wished she had looked at his eyes instead, because she wanted to watch them and see where they travelled. Did he look her over like he had Isabelle?

Dr. Ramsey suddenly cleared his throat loudly.

“Rookie…” he almost whispered, finally locking his gaze onto hers.

“Only sufficient?” Maggie pouted.  

She could feel a bead of water running from the end of her hair down her chest between her breasts and she held her composure perfectly as she watched her favorite teacher’s eyes follow the path of the drop.

“More than sufficient.”

And with that he stepped into the bathroom, leaving Maggie to finish getting ready.  

--

The reception was everything Maggie dreamed it would be. She got to wear her fancy dress and drink champagne all with Dr. Ethan Ramsey on her arm. If she had the chance to go back to high-school-Maggie and tell herself that this would be her life, high-school-Maggie never in a million years would have believed her.

She was trying to take mental inventory of everything. Not just the amazing food and ambiance, but the way Dr. Ramsey looked in a tux, the way he had given his approval with a curt nod as she spun around for him in their hotel room, asking him if she “looked okay.” Maggie didn’t want this night to ever end.

The reception had been held by the pool at the resort and eventually, they had to shut it down. Maggie had convinced Dr. Ramsey to stay until the bitter end, even though she had her shoes off and could barely keep her eyes open, when the music stopped and people started picking up, she knew it was time to go.

The bartender was packing up and called out to the couple as they passed by.

“You all want this?” He held out a bottle of champagne.

“It’s already been paid for.”

“Of course it has.” Dr. Ramsey responded as Maggie reached out to grab the bottle.

“And of course we do!” She giggled a little, taking the bottle and wiggling her eyebrows.

Dr. Ramsey couldn’t even stifle a smile this time. Maggie thought that perhaps, despite himself, he had a good night with her and for a few moments, maybe he actually enjoyed himself.

Once the couple exited the elevators on the floor of their room, they walked down the long hallway to the very end where their suite was waiting.  Occasionally Maggie’s hand would brush with Dr. Ramsey’s as he held the champagne bottle by his side. She could tell something had changed. There was a new electricity between them now.  She hoped it wasn’t just the buzz from the multiple glasses of Prosecco she consumed.

“Maggie…” he trailed off just as they reached their room.

“I had a nice time tonight.”

She couldn’t find her voice as she was lost in his incredibly bright blue eyes. They were always piercing but, in this moment, they looked a more intense shade of blue than she had ever seen or noticed before. He stood there, watching her, and she waited for her own brain and mouth to connect in order to respond but nothing came out. She was only able to smile and nod.

The familiar heat spread again on her cheeks, her neck and chest. He opened the door slowly and went to gather more champagne flutes from the table outside on the balcony.

“It’s a beautiful evening and it’s not over yet. Let’s drink out here!” He called to her.

Maggie felt like she was floating. She took a deep breath, dropped her shoes on the floor, and followed him outside. The view was breathtaking, both him and the oceanside. He brought her a flute, held up his glass and looked at her as he spoke.

“A toast. To you. The marvelous Dr. Maggie Valentine. Cheers to surviving your first medical symposium and a day with me. You truly are the finest intern Edenbrook has ever…” he paused adding dramatic effect, “…ever had.”

“Dr. Ramsey – I don’t know what to say, I…” Maggie felt like crying she was so proud of herself and so glad he felt that way about her, but he cut her off.

“Ethan.”

She nodded, taking a drink.

“Please, call me Ethan.”

Ethan exhaled quickly, took a drink of champagne and then began to speak again. Maggie couldn’t be sure, but it seemed as though his voice was a little shaky as he started.

“I owe you an apology. I’ve been short and more cranky than normal as of late.” He moved to the railing, holding his glass with both hands and leaning over it.

Maggie almost interjected but decided against it. She wanted to see where this was going and what he would say next.

“This trip has been very difficult for me. And I don’t like to admit when I find things challenging or tough.  I thought I could handle this. I thought it would be different. I’ve just never…”

“…felt like this before?” Maggie blurted it out without thinking. Her eyes grew wide, she covered her mouth with her free hand and spilled a little champagne in the process.

Ethan’s head turned slowly to face her. His smile turned into his trademark smirk and Maggie was done for.

“That’s it exactly, Maggie. I’ve tried. So hard…but this trip -- being together so much just us, one on one, and seeing you like this and being with you tonight, everything has just made it impossible.”

And there it was. Just like that he called her Maggie. She was now on a first name basis with Dr. – no – Ethan. Strangely, she was calm. Her pulse was normal, she was concentrating on him and him alone.  

He quickly finished what remained in his glass and set it on the table, taking her free hand in his.

“I could say all of that, too.” She gulped.

Remembering she also had champagne, she took a sip and shivered as he ran his thumb lazily across her knuckles. The words continued to come out of her mouth before she could even think.

“I can’t even believe that right now, I’m me and you’re you and we’re standing here on this balcony looking at the ocean, all dressed up, together. Like actually together. And you’re holding my hand and I just…I’ve wanted this…with you…”

Ethan nodded and without saying a word, took her face in his hands and whispered, “And I want you.”

Maggie didn’t know what was happening anymore. She wasn’t sure if she moved in for the kiss or if he was going to do it anyway, but it didn’t matter. She was now officially in the arms of Dr. Ethan freaking Ramsey and she was going to enjoy it.

After a few moments the passion was intensifying between them both and Maggie took a quick step back, holding Ethan at arm’s length.

“What’s the matter? Is something wrong?”

“Not a thing.” She smiled, holding his gaze and looking at him fondly.

“I want to remember this. There’s not one second of this moment I want to ever forget.”

Ethan smiled and then moved closer to her, nuzzling her neck just below her ear and moving her towards the bed, where the two of them tangled themselves together for hours, enjoying their evening and each other long into the night.

[blazerina]

Anyone want to make requests off of this?! For a pairing I write?? Please?? I wanna make you happy!! That would make me happy during these quaran-times!! xoxo 💋

Sentence Starters

“I’ve never seen one of these completely to my taste so i decided to make my own!

ANGST

“I can’t do anything right.”

“Please don’t cry.”

“Why are you awake right now?”

“Why are you lying to me?”

“Wake up! Please wake up.”

“Forget it, you’re a fucking asshole.”

“Don’t you ever do that again!”

“Is that blood?” “…..No?”

“Please don’t lie to me again, I can’t take it.”

“Do you even still love me?”

“Nobody’s seen you in days.”

“Why are you awake?”

“I’m worried about you.”

“Can you shut up for once in your life?”

“Holding everything in doesn’t help, you know.”

“Are you hurt?” “No.” “Then why are there bruises all over your face?”

“If you don’t hug me right now I think I might fall apart.”

“Leave! Me! Alone!”

FLUFF

“Go with me?” “As long as you hold my hand.”

“Is there a reason you’re blushing like that?” 

“Have you seen my hoodie?” “Nooo.” “You’re wearing it, aren’t you?”

“Have you always been this beautiful?”

“OH you’re jealous!”

“Can we stay like this forever?”

“Please just kiss me already.”

“I think you might be my soulmate.”

“Sleep over? Please?”

“Are we on a date right now?”

“I think I’m in love with you.”

“He’s so pretty I think I’m gonna faint.”

“Are you flirting with me?” “You finally noticed?”

“Am I your lockscreen?” “You weren’t supposed to see that.”

“I missed you so much.”

“Do you think the moon is jealous of how pretty you are?”

“I’m here for you.”

“I wish we could live together already.”

MISC

“All I do is drink coffee and say bad words.”

“Quit touching me, your feet are cold!”

“I think I just ripped my pants.”

“Sharing is caring, now give me the hoodie!”

“Can I pet your dog?” “Do I know you?”

“Did you seriously just get your foot stuck in a toilet?” “Maybe.”

“If I die, I’m haunting you first.”

“But I’ve never told you that before.” 

“Stop being grumpy, it’s lame.”

“So, uh, I locked the keys in the car.”

“Is the cat in a onesie?” “Uh, no?

“Can we please stop running? I think I’m dying.”

“You come here often?” “Well, I work here. So I think I’d have to say ‘yes’.”

“Aren’t we supposed to be working?”

“Give me attention.”

“YOU SAID TO BE HONEST STOP HITTING ME!”

“Okay, so maybe I didn’t see that coming.”

“I’m too sober for this.” “You don’t even drink.” “Maybe I should start.”

[blazerina]

Losing (Ethan x MC)

Losing (Ethan x MC)

Word Count: 3090

A/N: Last Sunday, I wrote and posted a very random story, Winning, that came to me out of NOWHERE and y’all ate it up! I was so pleasantly surprised by the reactions to this little scene that I didn’t expect to be any good!! It was such a success (and I left it at such a cliffhanger) that part two was basically demanded (I’m not complaining). So this is it - part two…hope it doesn’t disappoint! I am terrified of posting this because I’m just not good at all with “part twos.”  Please enjoy and I hope all of you are happy, safe and healthy! Be well. xoxo

Tag List [they didn’t work the first time so I had to re-post]: @parkerattano @queencarb @custaroonie @mkamra2355 @humanpokemon @ramseysno1rookie @unknowntimelady @myusualnerdyself @schnitzelbutterfinger @mvalentine @jasminedayz @thanialis @tefigranger @kenzierookie @justanotherrookie @keepcreativechoices @heauxplesslydevoted @ethandaddyramsey @kaavyaethanramsey @sherlockedmcu @edith-eggs1  @noboundariesplease @edgiestwinter @danysims4cc @tempesreture @unusualvisionsblog @chasingrobbie @mapipa @lifeof-liv @3riche-blog @anonymous2094 @annaidziaszczyk @ntoraplayschoices @jessirosebud @mskinkyafro @caseyvalentineramsey @desmaranj

The room was spinning. His head was on fire. And pounding. And throbbing. And his neck ached. His shoulders were tense. He felt nauseous. If he was experiencing all of this before so much as sitting up in bed, he could not fathom how actually trying to walk to the bathroom would feel. He didn’t have the ability to even begin to try and piece together the events of the night before.  All he could focus on right now was willing his body, which felt like it weighed a thousand pounds, to sit up and get out of bed.

What time is it?

Ethan reached for his phone and groaned. 7:08 am.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then rolled over onto his side and sat up gradually, letting his legs dangle off the bed. Timidly, he exhaled slowly and opened his eyes. It was exactly as he expected. More spinning. More fire.  More throbbing.  

His throat was incredibly dry, and he needed water, but also something more.  He reached over his nightstand and grabbed his glasses, hoping that his vision adjustment would help his aching head.  He was wrong.

A glass of water?

Ethan noticed a glass of water and four ibuprofen pills were also on the bedside table.

I even amaze myself sometimes.

He didn’t remember getting a glass of water or medicine, or changing out of his clothes, but then again, he really didn’t remember much of last night at all.  He gladly took the medicine and chugged the glass of water, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand when he finished.

He stumbled into the bathroom and retched a few times, over the sink, then moved to get his toothbrush. The taste of his own breath was making him queasy. He noticed his reflection in the mirror and almost didn’t even recognize himself.  Bloodshot, dry eyes. Pasty skin.  He was in desperate need of a shower. His hair was a complete mess, swept to one side of his head and sticking straight up in some parts.

Christ, I look like shit. I feel like shit.

Ethan knew his next step needed to be making breakfast and coffee. It was imperative that he remedy his empty stomach as soon as possible.  The early morning sunlight was streaming in through his large glass windows as entered his living room. Shielding his eyes, he quickly padded to the window and closed the drapes. He hardly ever did that, but this morning it was a necessity. He stopped to catch his breath after closing them, hearing his own heartbeat in his ears.

Staggering into the kitchen, he propped himself up on the counter with both hands. His head was hanging low and he couldn’t remember the last time he felt this way. He was one who took great pride in his ability to hold his liquor. Something must have really thrown him a curveball last night.

As his eyes surveyed the kitchen, mentally taking an inventory of what menu options he had available, he noticed that the coffee pot was blinking, signaling it only needed the button to be pressed; the coffee grounds and water had already been added. A bag of bagels was tightly wrapped and sitting on the counter next to a plate, along with a napkin and knife. His toaster, that he only got out when he had the sole intention of toasting something, was also out.

What the hell?!

He pressed the button on the coffee maker and plopped a cinnamon raisin bagel into the toaster.  Opening the fridge, he grabbed some cream cheese, but then leaned against the counter with a heavy sigh. Even that little bit of effort had taken a lot out of him.

God, let this pass soon.

Methodically, Ethan made his coffee and the rest of his bagel and took a seat at his kitchen table. Holding his head in his hands for a few moments before he began to eat, he took another deep breath, whispering a prayer, asking for the food and coffee to work. For it to be enough to quell his headache and nausea.  He still had to somehow make it into the office today.

The office today…

Remembering Edenbrook set his mind in motion and all at once a tsunami of memories flooded his brain. Everything from the night before played out once again, clearly.  All that he saw.  All that he said.  All that he did.

He remembered Reggie getting him in the cab, and someone pulling him out…but beyond that it was a little hazy.  As he brought his coffee mug to his lips, the front door of his apartment opened, and Ethan almost choked recognizing who it was.

She had earbuds in and had clearly just been on a run.  She was intently listening to music or a podcast, Ethan couldn’t be sure.  From the entry she couldn’t see him, but he could see her. All of her. In a tight tank top and leggings. Almost exactly the same outfit she wore when she worked out with the boys that random Tuesday morning. He had all but forgotten about the curve of her waist and her amazing ass. As his eyes travelled and marveled at her body, Ethan thought his head was about to explode. He was experiencing mental whiplash remembering last night and then unexpectedly seeing her this morning. He was confused and had no idea what was going on.

Am I dreaming?

Jenner came trotting in behind Allie as she held the door open for the pup.  She then hung Jenner’s leash up on the hooks by the door.  

Earbuds still prominently fixed to her ears, she told Jenner she was a good girl and turned over her shoulder towards the kitchen when she saw him. He was holding his coffee mug with both hands, mouth agape, totally frozen.

“Jesus!” she called out, clutching her chest, taking a moment to collect herself. She took her earbuds out and placed them on the counter, still breathing a little heavy.

“Sorry…” Ethan choked out, his voice raspy and harsh.

“It’s only right that should be the first word you say to me.”

Ethan sighed.

Of course she has some smart ass remark. This is a great way to start the day.

“Allie, please.  I didn’t ask you to do all this for me. I can handle myself.”

“Are we really going to get into it first thing this morning? Is this really what you want to be doing right now? Arguing with me?”

He could tell she was in no mood for pleasantries, so he stopped talking and focused on his coffee and his bagel.  It was not lost on him that he was sitting at his table in his underwear and a white t-shirt with crazy bed-head, in front of the love of his life.  The woman he was too damn proud to be completely honest with.

Allie remembered her way around Ethan’s kitchen much better than he expected.  She poured herself a cup of coffee as he watched her every move. Grabbing a banana from a bowl on the bar, she leaned against it, facing him, making eye contact as she peeled the fruit.

Her intention was not to make it sensual, but Ethan’s mind went there right away. Watching her hands as she unfolded the peel and her lips as she began to eat, he couldn’t remember how bad his head hurt, or feeling ill anymore.

Completely oblivious to Ethan’s thoughts, Allie took a long sip of her coffee, a deep breath and cleared her throat.

“You’re welcome, by the way.”

Her voice broke through Ethan’s sudden daydream and the silence hanging heavy over them both.

He looked away from her, noticing that Jenner was eating her own food from her dish.  Allie really had thought of everything. She chose to take care of him, even after what he had done.

“I suppose I should thank you.  I don’t know everything you did for me, but I suspect it was quite a lot. I appreciate it. And Jenner does too.”

Allie nodded solemnly, taking her banana trash to the kitchen.  She grabbed her keys and a phone from the counter and pulled a sweatshirt on over her head.

“Last night...” She started to talk but then cut herself off.  

Ethan watched her. He knew she was about to leave. She took another drink of coffee and then rinsed out her cup in the sink.

Why are you doing this, you ignorant buffoon? Say something. Do something.

His fists clenched around the mug he was still holding in both hands. He hadn’t moved much and felt like he couldn’t -- he was paralyzed. Paralyzed with fear about how she regarded him now. Paralyzed with fear that he had now lost her forever.

The familiar ping of her cell phone rang out and almost echoed in the entrance of his apartment home. Allie checked it and smiled a little, looking back to Ethan.

Immediately he felt the anger course through his veins again.

Wonder who that was from. I swear to God if it’s Tobias or that dumb ass scalpel jockey…

“This doesn’t mean I forgive you; you know.” Allie explained, absentmindedly twisting her keychain around her index finger, glancing at the floor.

“To be clear, me taking care of you like this does not mean that I’m not pissed.  There is no excuse for what you said to me last night, Ethan, or your behavior in general.”

“Allie…” He began, but she held up her hand to stop him.

“Please let me finish.”

Ethan stopped and watched her shudder. She took a deep breath and it was evident that whatever she was about to say was taking an extreme amount of bravery and courage. She was clearly having to work herself up to spitting out these next words. Ethan was doing what he was used to; putting on his armor, ready to defend himself if necessary, even though he knew he had no right to defend himself this morning. Everything he was feeling was well-deserved. The retaliation he was going to get from her was more than fair.

“When I talked to Reggie last night and asked him to help me get you home, I didn’t know that you’d end up puking on me in the elevator on the way up to your apartment, or that tucking you into bed would mean I get to hear a confession from you about your undying love for me. You acted as if you were on your deathbed, and honestly, it was not cute.

But God help me, Ethan, I just couldn’t bear the thought of you trying to navigate being drunk and hung over all on your own. I thought about you here, all by yourself, stumbling around, struggling to function, and I felt bad.  I’m sure you’ve done it before, but something about the look in your eyes last night scared me.  I knew I’d never forgive myself if I saw you leave that way and did nothing to help.

For some reason that I cannot for the life of me figure out, I still…after all we’ve been through…care about you.

Dammit! I don’t want to, but I do.”

Ethan gulped, waiting for her to say more, but she didn’t. She was through. Once again paralyzed, he didn’t know what to do or say.

Don’t let her leave. You cannot let her walk out that door.

“Why did you…I mean I didn’t…ugh…” He cleared his throat, feeling flushed.

“I just can’t…” He fumbled and stumbled over his words, struggling to find his voice.

“I have to go and get ready for work. Naveen knows that you’ll be in later today and I asked Diane to move our diagnostics team meeting to this afternoon, in order to allow you enough time to get your shit together. Guess I’ll see you later.”

Ethan watched her open the door to leave, trying to stand but still feeling woozy.  

Allie’s head popped back into the doorframe as she mentioned, “Your key is on the kitchen countertop by the way.”

The door closed behind her with a soft thud, as Ethan was still trying to put together something to say. Once again, he questioned himself.

What the hell just happened?

--

Later on, Ethan text Naveen to let him know that he was on his way into work.  Naveen met him at his office with a venti Starbucks coffee in hand.

“The name on the cup says Ethan, but from what I’m hearing today it should say something a little more accurate.” He scolded, handing the cup to Ethan as he entered his own office.

“Oh yeah? Like what?” Ethan frowned.

He wasn’t surprised, but still not thrilled to learn that the rumor and gossip mill at Edenbrook had picked his story up as one of the daily headlines.

“Perhaps something like total jerk, or complete asshole, would better describe your actions post-softball game last night?” Naveen raised an eyebrow and kept a stoic look on his face.

“I don’t like hearing about this side of you Ethan. It’s one thing to experience it in private, but another to know it’s been witnessed in public. I don’t have to tell you it’s wrong because you already know that. But I do expect you to make it right. Make it right, Dr. Ramsey.”

With that directive, Dr. Banerji left the room and the glass doors hissed behind him as they closed.

Ethan slumped into his chair like the pile of goo he felt like.  He was beat up and broken down, but knew he only had himself to blame.

--

He had been dreading the afternoon meeting of his diagnostic team, mainly because he knew he had to see her again. He had no idea what to expect from her. He’d been hiding in his office all day, trying to keep people from staring at him as he walked the halls like some sort of sideshow freak.

June and Baz were early to the meeting and much to everyone’s surprise, Dr. Banerji decided “on a whim” to join the team for the day. Everyone was silent while waiting on Dr. Valentine to arrive.

Ethan would have to deal with Naveen later. He knew damn well why he decided “on a whim” to attend the meeting today.

Who does he think he is? This is just what I need right now, to have to worry about him too on top of all this.

Allie walked in just then, not in a dramatic fashion, but a very normal, typical everyday way. No one would know anything was wrong or different from the way she was acting…at least…so far.

“Hi everyone, sorry I’m the last one here. Esme’s had a hard day.  Hope you weren’t waiting too long!”

Still thinking about everyone else. I’ll be damned if I’m ever going to be as good of a person as she is.

Much to Ethan’s surprise, the meeting went on like normal too. Naveen contributed to the conversation and they were able to discuss quite a few patients this time, when typically, they only have time to focus on one.  

As they wrapped up the meeting, Ethan stood up abruptly.

“There is one more thing I’d like to say before we disperse.”

Allie sat back down, as she had already packed up her things. It seemed as though she wanted to make a quick exit.

“I just wanted to say that I’m grateful for the way this team takes care of each other.” He locked eyes with Allie, refusing to look away.

Eventually, she did.

“We work together well, all striving towards the same goal. Looking out for one another and stepping in to correct each other too when one of us may be going down the wrong path…”

He could tell Baz and June were a little taken aback by his thoughtful speech and were slightly confused.

“I just don’t take it for granted and I wanted to say thank you.”

Ethan looked again at Allie, then sat back down.

“That will be all for today, thank you team.”

As everyone packed up, Allie was a little slower than she had been before.  Dr. Banerji made the rounds, shaking hands with all the doctors in the room as they exited.

“Make it right, Ethan.” He reminded as he waved to Allie and left the two of them alone.

Dr. Valentine was headed toward the door again, folders and charts in hand, when Ethan placed a hand on her elbow and gently asked her to stay.

“I’m no good at saying sorry…” Ethan began.

“I know.” Allie agreed, holding the folders and charts close to her chest.

“I need you to hear this, though. Please.” He sighed, not sure how to begin.

“There’s nothing I can do or say to take back what I did to you last night. I’m not even fully aware of all that I did and all that I said…and quite frankly, I’m not sure I want to be.

I’m not going to ask you to forgive me. You explained yourself this morning regarding forgiveness, and I could not agree with you more. I do not deserve the kindness you showed me.

But you…you deserve so much more than anything I can give to you. Last night was proof of that. And honestly, you deserve an apology that’s a hulluva lot better than this one.”

Ethan nodded at her, wanting desperately to reach out for her hand and pull her into him, holding her close. But he knew he couldn’t. Not now. Not after everything he’d done and all the damage he had caused.

“You’re right.” Allie said, swallowing hard. Ethan thought he might have seen a hint of tears in her eyes.

“I do deserve an apology better than this one…but I’ll take what I can get.”

Sadly, she gave him a tight smile and walked out of the room. Ethan watched her go, hoping he had not let her walk out of his life forever.  

He knew he’d take what he could get too and what made him sad was that it took him getting angry, drunk and jealous to realize he’d rather have Allie in hard times like these, than to not have her at all.

He had gone from winning a softball game against his rival to losing the only woman he ever truly loved, all within in 24 hours.

[blazerina]

Connected - Harper/Ethan/Allie (MC) - Open Heart

Connected – Harper/Ethan/Allie (MC) – Open Heart

Word Count: 2612

A/N: This story is based on this amazing song A Soulmate Who Wasn't Meant to Be – sent to me and requested by @unusualvisionsblog​ – thank you so much for the inspiration to finish this story. It took me a while but I’m really proud of how it all ended up.

Tagging my two fandom BFF’s @justanotherrookie​ and @parkerattano​ because they never fail to encourage and motivate me. Thankful for you ladies!

Lyrics to the song are below – I encourage you to listen while reading. It really sets the tone!

A Soulmate Who Wasn’t Meant to Be

I never should have called

‘Cause I knew you’d leave me

But I didn’t think

You could do it

So easily

I never should have held your hand

On that cold rainy night

‘Cause further along

It would cause another fight

 Stranger

That’s all I see

When I look into your eyes

A soulmate who wasn’t meant to be

 Stranger

Who knows all my secrets

Can pull me apart and break my heart

A soulmate who wasn’t meant to be

 I never should have kissed

Kissed your hand

I’m under your control

I will never understand

 I never should have said

I love you

Never said it back

So why do I still care for you?

 Stranger

That’s all I see

When I look into your eyes

A soulmate who wasn’t meant to be

 Stranger

Who knows all my secrets

Can pull me apart and break my heart

A soulmate who wasn’t meant to be

 Wish I could go back to the day we met and leave you be

Sit and look pretty

 Never should have called

Never should have held

Never should have kissed

Never should have said…

 Stranger

That’s all I see

When I look into your eyes

A soulmate who wasn’t meant to be

 Stranger

Who knows all my secrets

Can pull me apart and break my heart

A soulmate who wasn’t meant to be

--

--

Harper rolled over and pulled her phone off the nightstand to check the time.  She had been awake for a while but could tell by the faint light coming in through her window, that it was getting close to the time she needed to get up.

She sighed heavily as she realized her phone confirmed her assumption. Harper blinked a few times to ensure she was fully awake, already annoyed with the day.  She rolled over onto her other side and gently nudged her sleeping companion.

“Sam…Sam, wake up. It’s time for you to go. I have to get ready for work.”

The man next to her was clearly in no hurry to get out of bed.  He faced Harper with his eyes still closed, reaching out for her.

“Baby, we don’t need to be in a rush…” Clearly, he thought he was smooth. And clearly, he didn’t know who he was dealing with.

“I will not ask you again to get out of my bed.” Harper declared. “I told you last night this was a one-time thing.”

She slithered out of the bed, keeping one sheet wrapped around her naked body. Making her way to her bathroom, she called out to him, “I expect you to be gone by the time my shower is done.  You can see yourself out. Don’t leave anything behind because I’m not calling you back.”

The bathroom door forcefully closed behind her and Harper turned on the water.  Pushing herself over the sink, looking more closely at her reflection, she studied herself, looking into her own eyes.

She never meant to become the kind of person who had a string of one-night stands.  It wasn’t a part of her life she was especially proud of, but it served its purpose.  She was too old to be asking herself who she was, or to be trying to find her identity. Those years were safely behind her.  She owed it to herself to make up her own mind. She earned the freedom to stand by her own decisions without regret. The past was the past.

Part of her was relieved that she no longer had to share this portion of her life with the hospital. For far too long everyone from fellow doctors and administrators to volunteers and janitors, knew all about her every move. She was used to living in a fishbowl, but she was definitely over it. It wasn’t enough that she was proving herself to be a well-known and reputable medical professional, or that she was running one of the state’s largest and most prominent hospitals. Everyone needed to know about her personal life. She lost count of how many times people told her they couldn’t trust her if they didn’t know what she was “really like outside of this place.”

Ask anyone at Edenbrook about Harper Emery and you get a wide range of responses. Most people know her as a fine administrator and capable surgeon. Others are notoriously opposed to the way she performed as Chief and are thankful she’s been replaced by Naveen.  Across the country she’s known for her expertise in surgery and her swift, decisive actions that have saved countless lives. A majority of medical staff see her as fair but firm, with high expectations and standards, not only for herself but everyone she works with.

Of all the things people have said about her, and the gossip she’s heard behind her back for years, there’s always one statement that sticks in her mind the most and haunts her every day. She can see it in their eyes when they find out; especially the interns when they’re finally told.

She walks down the halls and all goes silent except for the clacking of her heels on the cold stone floor. A small smirk appears on her face as people try to busy themselves with work before she asks them what they’re doing.

Despite all her achievements and the work she is proud of accomplishing, she’s come to terms with the fact that she’ll be remembered for one thing as she brushes past a group and someone inevitably whispers:

There goes Dr. Harper Emery. Former Chief of Medicine and former girlfriend of Dr. Ethan Ramsey. That’s all you really need to know.

--

Allie sat in the cafeteria staring dejectedly into her bowl of soup, absentmindedly stirring it every few seconds. Her head was propped up on her hand with her elbow on the table. Her long red hair was in a pile on top of her head. Her eyes tired. Her feet aching. Her mind elsewhere.

Lately she had been thinking about Ethan. That was nothing new. She hated how their situation was at present. He clearly wanted to be with her, practically reached out to her on numerous occasions, but something was stopping him.  She heard time and time again that it was because of his care for her. That he wanted her to be the best doctor possible and he couldn’t do that and provide for her professionally if they were more than just colleagues. She rolled her eyes with disdain remembering how and when he said that word.

Professional.

It made her retch for a moment.  She had already been working for about eight-hours of her twelve-hour shift and she wondered how she’d make it the next four.  Allie turned her attention out the widow that overlooked a peaceful courtyard where patients or staff could go for a moment of quiet during the day.

She knew that her outlook on her relationship with Ethan had changed drastically over the past few weeks. At first, she thought she’d be able to handle it.  Ethan’s decision made sense and she’d stop at nothing to make sure she could be the best doctor possible, but lately she’d been struggling.  And right outside that window, sitting on a bench next to a patient in the courtyard, was the very reason why.

Dr. Harper Emery.

Allie didn’t know much about her past relationship with Ethan, only that she had one. And clearly it wasn’t an issue for him to be with her, so why was it such a big deal if she and Ethan wanted to be together instead?

In her head, Allie knew the difference. A subordinate and a supervisor is much different than two colleagues on the same level of the org chart, but her heart…her fickle-overly-emotional-prideful-too-hurt-to-admit-it heart, chanted to her over and over again:

You’re not good enough. You’ll never be her. There’s a real reason he didn’t want you. Do you honestly think you could measure up to that? She’s perfect. What would he ever see in someone like you?

It made it worse that Harper was the consummate professional around Allie. She was polite and welcoming, not warm, but still somehow hospitable. There had been a few times that she pushed back on Allie and challenged her, but nothing over the line.

Of course, it’s easy for her to do that.

The voice in her head reminded her.

She knows she’s got you beat in every category. You’ll never be competition to her.

Allie had even been watching Harper more intently when she worked with Ethan. There were so many little things that she had not noticed before.  A few days ago, as Allie arrived for her shift, she noticed Harper helping him with his tie outside the cafeteria. A soft smile formed at the corners of her mouth as she straitened it for him and looked him in the eye.

“What would I do without you?” Ethan asked, his tone a bit too playful for Allie’s taste.

“Oh, you’d find a way to manage.” Harper responded. “After all, you’re Doctor Ethan Ramsey. You don’t let anyone around here forget it.”

Her composure as polite and calm as ever, Harper turned quickly on her heel and walked away. Allie swore Ethan’s eyes followed her all the way down the hall.

Allie knew that pining away for Ethan and obsessing over his every interaction with Dr. Emery would not serve her well. She needed to focus.  But it was becoming more and more difficult. She was starting to lose confidence in herself and her abilities, which made her need and desire for Ethan all the more great.

He was the one who told her she could do anything.  He was the mentor that taught her everything she knew about being a doctor. He was the one she needed.  The one she was meant to be with forever.

All she had to do was convince him she was worth it.

Inevitably, the seed of doubt sprouted again in that arrogant-unstable-frustratingly-emotional heart of hers.

Who am I kidding? If Ethan couldn’t even make it work with someone as amazingly flawless as Harper Emery, how the hell do I stand a chance?

--

There they were.  The two most prominent women in his life, chatting together in the hallway, right in front of his office.

Ethan told himself this couldn’t be good.  Each woman on their own was difficult enough but seeing the two of them together made his pulse quicken. He felt his throat start to itch and he loosened his tie a bit, feeling a slight sting of anxiety in his stomach as he approached them.

“Dr. Emery.” He nodded. “Dr. Valentine.”

“To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit? Please, come in.”

“I told you.” Harper crossed her arms in front of her chest and raised one eyebrow in triumph, nodding towards Allie.

“Told her what?” Ethan asked, confused.

“We aren’t here to see you.” Allie explained.  “We are discussing tomorrow’s surgery for Ms. Hogan. And as we were talk-“

Harper cut Allie off mid-sentence.

“I told Dr. Valentine that we should probably move this conversation elsewhere or finish before you returned, otherwise you’d think our presence at your door had something to do with you.”

“Sorry to inform you that it doesn’t…” Allie looked amused.

“I see.” Ethan responded shortly, his brow wrinkled, slightly irritated.

“You walked right into it, Ramsey.” Harper teased.

“Well played. I bid you all a good afternoon then. Seeing as how I’m not needed, even though you two purposefully stopped right outside my office. Let’s carry on with our work now instead of playing games, shall we?”

Ethan walked into his office and closed the door behind him, letting out a long sigh.  The sight of those two, hearing their voices, the knowing way they mocked him, it was almost too much for him to handle. Harper was always quick to prove him wrong and reveled in any opportunity to do so.

He cursed himself for pursuing anything of substance with either one of them. He hated having regrets, but to see how things has ended up for all of them, he couldn’t help it.  Nothing felt natural anymore – at least not for him. Everything was thought through and carried out with the utmost precision. His actions felt robotic as he made doubly sure not to make either of those women think he still had feelings for them.

Ethan was most careful to watch himself around Allie, as his time with her was the more recent and the most potent. It was challenging, though. He was drawn to her by a indescribable force. It took everything within him to pull himself away from her. In meetings, at the front desk, in the elevator, talking with patients, she always said or did something that made him weak in the knees.  

It was killing him not to be able to see her after work, to spend time with her outside the office, to hear about her life beyond the walls of the hospital but he knew it was the right thing for her. If he had any desire to protect her or keep her safe and not hurt her any more than he already had, this is the way it needed to be.  

Getting mixed up with a guy like him was bad news, just look at what it did to Harper.

Harper had always been the model of decorum; prim and proper, respected by all – but Ethan wasn’t stupid. He knew that now a part of her sterling reputation had been tarnished because of him. He heard the low voices whispering behind her back as she passed by. He was all to familiar now with the light in the interns’ eyes, how they lit up with intrigue when they found out that he and Harper had been…

What had they been? It was never anything real, which he blamed himself for.  They had each other when they needed each other and that was about it.

Nothing substantial. Nothing with roots.  Nothing that would last.

Nothing like…

His pager went off, rousing him from his diatribe of thoughts.  Silently he opened the door and went to follow the page, not even noticing that Harper and Allie were still there, chatting away.

--

It was the end of another unremarkable day at Edenbrook. Harper was headed with her bag in hand towards the elevator doors, but they were closing too quickly.

At the last second, she made the decision to head towards the stairs, when a familiar voice called out:

“Harper. Come on, plenty of room in here.”

That voice would stop her in her tracks anywhere.

“Thank you, Ethan.” She smiled tightly as she entered the elevator with him. He held the doors open until she was settled and then pressed the button to close them.

Such a typical Ethan-move. Harper thought to herself.  

Trying to win me over with his charm and chivalry. Don’t do it Harper, don’t fall for it. Not again. He’s not worth it.

Ethan focused his eyes straight ahead trying not to engage.

Leave her alone. You have to let her go.

--

Allie was ready to leave. The remaining portion of her shift had not passed as quickly as she had hoped. Nervous, yawning, grumpy and ready to soak her throbbing feet, she impatiently waited for the elevator to reach her floor. She could not wait to once again be reunited with her beloved bed.

The monotone bell rang out signaling the elevator’s arrival. She stepped in and surveyed the group of people also in the elevator. Parker from imaging. The really nice man in charge of housekeeping – she could never remember his name… – and Ethan.  

Of course there was Ethan.

And Harper.  

Lovely.

The nameless housekeeping man was first to exit. This ride was now officially long and uncomfortable. She wondered if Ethan and Harper felt the same.

A few floors later, Parker from imaging said a courteous goodnight and left the elevator.

Only four more floors to go.

All that remained was the three of them, each one with their eyes silently fixed on the numbers above the elevator doors.  They illuminated, one by one, giving them hope that this uneasy metal box would deliver them from this situation soon.

Four…

The reputable doctor marred by transgressions with a colleague unable to forgive herself for wanting true love.

Three…

The world-renown diagnostician, somehow able to have so much and yet so little at the same time, feeling remorse for hurting two perfectly fine young women beyond repair.

Two…

An innocent second-year resident, thrown into a world she wasn’t ready for, caught up in confusion about her own feelings and comparing herself to someone she secretly admired and hoped to become.

One…

All three tired of being lonely, disappointed in themselves, and wanting nothing more than true, life-long companionship.

All three connected not by choice but by fate yet going home, once again, all alone.

[blazerina]

Sick Day (Ethan x MC)

Sick Day // Ethan x MC // Open Heart

Word Count: 1301

A/N: A little drabble featuring the prompt from this amazing gif prompt list that @parkerattano put together. You can find this awesome post here .  This is based on prompt #1 – “You’re beautiful.” Hope you enjoy!! xoxo

Tag List:  @parkerattano @queencarb @custaroonie @mkamra2355 @humanpokemon @ramseysno1rookie @unknowntimelady @myusualnerdyself @schnitzelbutterfinger @mvalentine @jasminedayz @thanialis @tefigranger @kenzierookie @justanotherrookie @keepcreativechoices @heauxplesslydevoted @ethandaddyramsey @kaavyaethanramsey @sherlockedmcu @edith-eggs1  @noboundariesplease @edgiestwinter @danysims4cc @tempesreture @unusualvisionsblog @chasingrobbie @mapipa @lifeof-liv @3riche-blog @anonymous2094 @annaidziaszczyk @ntoraplayschoices @jessirosebud @mskinkyafro @caseyvalentineramsey @desmaranj @trappedinfandoms @lucy-268

--

“Dr. Valentine?” Ethan asked, pulling the phone away from his ear as the voice on the other end coughed violently.

“Sorry…” Allie replied, embarrassed. “I didn’t mean for that to happen.” She sniffled loudly into the phone.

“Did you, did you need something?”

Ethan could hear the congestion in her voice. Honestly, he thought she had been playing hooky because he saw her just yesterday and she seemed fine. But it was clear in his conversation with her so far, that she was indeed ill.

“I’m sorry to disturb you, as it sounds like you really should be getting some rest.  I called to ask if you might have accidentally taken my latest edition of the Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine home with you. I’ve been looking all over my office and cannot find it anywhere.”

He closed his eyes and grimaced, waiting for her response. He hoped she couldn’t tell it was a lie. He could get any information he needed from that journal online. The only reason he made up that flimsy excuse was to see if she really was sick, or if she was actually in such desperate need of a day off, that she was lying.

“Uh, hold on for one moment.” Allie sneezed in the background as Ethan listened to papers rustling and more coughing.

“I don’t think so, Dr. Ramsey. But if you need me to look for an article, I’m happy to do that from home. I really am fine I just…” She sneezed again.

“That won’t be necessary. Thanks anyway for looking for it and I hope to uh, see you back at work soon.”

Ethan hung up quickly and sat down at his desk with a heavy sigh. Chewing on his bottom lip, he got lost in deep thought.

You know the reason why you called her.

You missed seeing her at work today. You know she’d never intentionally miss a shift.

She has a major fear of missing out and wants to be all involved in everyone’s business here at the hospital.

You miss her.

Because just knowing where she is and what she’s doing day in and day out, makes you feel better.

His hand tightened into a fist as he thought through the fact that he really did miss her. He’d only been away from her for a few hours, but it felt like so much more than that. In that moment, he knew what he needed to do.

--

Ethan checked his watch before knocking on the door.  He had attempted to look more casual, but somehow felt a stiff as if he was wearing a tux for a formal night out. Brown paper bag in hand, he waited for a quite a while before he could hear shuffling behind the door.

“Dr. Ramsey, I can see through the peephole that it’s you, but I don’t want to get you sick.  I’m sorry but I don’t have that journal here with me…” Allie tried to explain.

“Allie, open the door.” He instructed.

“I don’t want to give you what I have.  You need to be able to go to wor—”

“Open.  The door.”

She did as he asked but only opened it a slightly.  It was cracked just enough for them to make eye contact.

Ethan wasn’t prepared for his instincts to take over the way they did. He had no idea the desire that would swell up inside of him to provide for her and make sure she was okay. He wanted to make her comfortable with a blanket and pillow on the couch; bring her 7Up and put on her favorite movie; check on her every few hours and make sure her temp stayed down with alternating doses of Tylenol and Ibuprofen.

He didn’t care that she was sick. Her red-rimmed eyes were glistening, only intensifying their hazel color.  The tip of her nose was dry and a light shade of pink. Her cheeks were flushed, and she looked very pale.

“I don’t care about the damn journal, Allie. Are you all right?”

He was genuinely concerned and hoped that she knew it.

“I mean, I’ve been better, but I’ll be okay.  You didn’t have to come…” She paused to cough, “…all the way out here to check on me.”

“When I heard your voice on the phone, I knew it was bad.” He admitted.

Allie nodded, feeling awkward.

“Are you alone?” Ethan asked, standing on his tiptoes to look over her head and into the apartment behind her.

He couldn’t see anyone else in the background.  The TV volume was the only noise.

“Ethan.”  Allie smiled, slowly, then covered her mouth afraid a cough was coming out.

“Look, I know this is weird and we haven’t talked much about how we can or can’t make things work between us now that you’re on the team, but…I was…I am…worried about you. I needed to see with my own eyes that you’re okay.”

Without saying a word, Allie opened the door and allowed Ethan to come in.

The area where she had holed up for the day was nothing short of a disaster. Crumpled tissues, dirty dishes, blankets and several pillows were everywhere, amidst journals and papers and medical notes that were also scattered all around the couch.  

“Please don’t judge. I feel like crap, okay?”

“No judgement. Truly. It’s just very…unexpected.” Ethan said as he surveyed the room and made his way to the kitchen.

“What’s that?” Allie asked, following him while motioning to the bag.

“Your dinner. I brought you some chicken soup.”

“Wow.” She responded, not able to contain her surprise.

“Where from?”

“Uhhh, Ramsey’s Kitchen?” Ethan raised his eyebrows as he took the lid off the tupperwear dish he brought.

“I know you’re not talking about Gordon…but, Ethan…you, you made this for me??” She questioned as  her eyes began watering.

“Settle in on the couch. I’ll bring it to you.” He ordered, proud of himself for being able to offer something of substance to her in her time of need.

Ethan fumbled his way around this unfamiliar, much smaller kitchen and managed to find a bowl and a spoon. By the time he got back to the couch to serve Allie her home-made soup, she was passed out asleep.

He put the soup on the coffee table in front of the couch, found a blanket on the floor and tucked her in, making sure she was covered.  He sat down beside her on the edge of the sofa and studied her for a moment.

She must have felt his eyes on her for she woke up quickly, startled.

“Ethan!” She immediately covered her face, whining.

“Ugh. I cannot believe you’re seeing me like this.  This apartment is a mess, I sound terrible, and I look awful.”

“Lay back down.” Ethan guided her, putting a fluffier pillow behind her head.  

“You’re beautiful.” He reminded her, locking his gaze to hers.

Leaning in, he gently kissed her forehead and Allie closed her eyes relishing the feel of his lips on her skin.

“You’re beautiful and you definitely have a fever. I’ll get you some meds and then I’m out of here. You need to rest. I need you back to work ASAP. The hospital feels…” he paused, to think of the perfect word, “…lonely…without you.”

A few minutes later, he scrounged up some over the counter drugs that would help alleviate her symptoms and let himself out of her apartment.

He knew she didn’t feel any better, but he sure did.  Getting to see her, talk to her and take care of her for a brief moment, helped him to remember what she meant to him.  He was reminded once again  that it truly would be worth it to fight for her.

[blazerina]

Rain - Mal x MC

Rain - Mal x MC

Word Count: 3202 

A/N – I meant to post this on Wednesday in place of our absent BOLAS chapter, but it took me a while to get this out. I’m pleased to debut this Mal story. Hope you all enjoy!!

--

“That’s not all I can do…”

A voluptuous woman approached Mal, but her face was indistinct.  Seductively she advanced towards him, swaying from side to side, ready to straddle him as he fell back against a comfortable, plush, lavishly decorated bed.  

“By all means, show me more…”

And just as their bodies were about to intwine –

“Mal!” Threep perched right beside his ear, hissing into it with a whisper.

“Are you kidding me?!” Mal sat up quickly, infuriated and confused.  

As he quickly remembered the rest of the group was sleeping nearby, he glared at Threep and shrugged.

“Gods, was that necessary? I was in the middle of an awesome dream.  I don’t have any food for you, you mongrel.”

Threep purred deeply and used his tail to point towards the entrance to their make-shift camp. A small fire was glowing in the distance. Scratching his head, trying to figure out what Threep was motioning towards, Mal looked around and realized someone was missing from the group.

With a heavy sigh, Mal got up. “All right, all right. I’ll go get her.”

“Tread lightly. I sense she is deeply troubled.” Threep cautioned, following at Mal’s heels.

“Also, please see if she has any snacks with her because I’m fami-“

“Do you mind?!” Tyril sat up sharply. “Some of us are trying to sleep. Take your little party elsewhere – far away from me.”

“If you all could please be a tiny bit quieter, I’m still trying to rest.” Nia chimed in. She didn’t sit up but made her request from where she was laying.

“All of you are going to end up tossed over the nearest cliff if you don’t shut up right this minute.” Imtura bellowed with a roar.

“Hey, hey, hey! You all need to relax…I’m handling it okay, everyone?”

“Handle it, WITHOUT MAKING NOISE.” Tyril rolled over onto his side with a huff as Mal dramatically tip-toed out of the area, leaving Threep behind.

--

Raine was sitting next to the small fire she made, knowing there was no need to be keeping watch. This was her turn to sleep; time for her to be resting and getting ready for the next adventure that awaited her new group of friends.  She found a large stick and began picking it apart, breaking it into little pieces and tossing it, piece by piece into the flames in front of her.

She had been having a lot of trouble sleeping lately. The further and further she went along this journey the harder and harder it was to quiet her mind.  She felt her chest tighten and her heart flutter a lot more lately, but she wasn’t sure if that was a direct correlation to the situations she was finding herself in, or due to her growing infatuation with Mal.

A loud crack and then a snap in the distance made Raine flinch. Instinctively, she jumped up, ready to pull an arrow at a moment’s notice. She spun around and immediately felt her heart do that fluttery thing again.

Seeing his face increased the heart palpitations she was feeling. Even if his face was contorted at the moment, as he tried to wipe away a large spider web from his hands and arms.

“Get – this – darn – ugh – there – no – off – away! Ugh. Hey there, kit.” He smirked, wiping his hands on his pants.

“Didn’t mean to scare you…”

Raine didn’t even realize she was frozen in position, aiming her bow directly at his chest. She dropped it almost immediately and smiled at him, grateful for his presence.

“I’m a bit jumpy these days. Glad it’s just you.”

“Just me? Since when has it ever been just me?” He raised an eyebrow, questioning her, holding his heart as if he was personally hurt and attacked by her comment.

Raine shrugged, returning to her position by the fire. She was in a daze and too focused to be taken in by his charm this evening. She wanted to be, but tonight, something else had her full attention.

--

“I’ve…uh...” Mal stuttered. He didn’t know what to say.  He scratched the back of his head, looking for the right words.

He could tell something was going on in that mind of hers. From the moment he laid eyes on her out here, all alone, in front of a fire, he just knew she wasn’t herself.

Mal was instantly attracted to her from the moment she ran into him back in Riverbend. It was something he had never felt before. The look in her eyes, the way she challenged him not knowing anything about who he was or what he was after – it intrigued him.

Sure, he told everyone he was used to being in peril. The group had heard story after story by now about countess after countess. They didn’t have to know that none of it was true. He built his reputation on being an adventurer, a seducer, someone who always got whatever it was he wanted, using his charm and deception.

Whenever he told his stories he was always being chased, always being taken in by some poor fool who felt bad for him and ended up being his saving grace. But this time? He felt like she was the one he was chasing. It wasn’t treasure, riches or fame he was after anymore. It was her heart.

Mal had been with her long enough to crave being near her when she was gone.  He eyed her in moments when she was all alone, watching her gentle movements. The way she cared for animals and others, the decisiveness with which she led their merry band of misfits, it was all so…genuine. None of it was a show. None of it was done with any kind of ulterior motive. She wanted to save her brother and that was that.

He made up his mind a long time ago to do whatever it takes to see this adventure through to the end. Not just because he cared enough about Raine to help her, but because he wanted her to be happy. He wanted her to get whatever it was she wanted most in this world. He wanted to be some small part of the reason she was successful in her mission.

He swallowed hard, all of these thoughts racing to his mind at once. Realizing how fast he had fallen for her scared him. Would she be able to see through him? What would she think of him when she realized he really was a fraud? He wasn’t all he said he was. He wasn’t as debonair and suave as he pretended to be.

Would the charm eventually wear off? Was it wearing off now? Was the one and only night they innocently spent in each other’s arms, all he was ever going to get with her?

“I’m okay, Mal.”

Thankfully, Raine’s comment interrupted his thoughts.  He sighed mentally, grateful for the break.

“Thanks for coming to check on me, but I think…”

She trailed off and Mal noticed she bit her lip. It was a tell he’d picked up from her pretty early on.

Whenever she had something more she wanted to say but stopped herself…she bit her lip.  

If she had to think really hard about what she was going to say because she was lying and didn’t want to give away a secret…she bit her lip.

Sometimes when she was joking around or teasing someone, trying to be funny and pull off a prank, she got a twinkle in her eye…and bit her lip.

Mal decided not to press. He stayed quiet and made himself a little place to lie down near the fire. He dragged a few logs over to prop his feet up onto and laid down with both hands behind his head, looking up at the sky.

Don’t mess this up, pal. He told himself, closing his eyes as he exhaled.

“Mal?” Raine called out quietly, after a few moments.

There it is…he smirked, keeping his eyes closed, thankful she couldn’t see his face at the moment.

Still got it. He told himself, ready to reply.

“Yes?”

“I know you’re…you’re used to this sort of thing…but do you ever…” Raine sighed, clearly having a hard time communicating her thoughts.

“Do you ever miss your life before all this?”

“Well…” Mal rolled over, facing her and propping himself up on his elbow.

“You forget, this is my life.  One might say this adventuring stuff is kind of, oh I don’t know, my thing.”  

He stopped and thought for a moment before adding, “Honestly, I didn’t have much of a life before this so there’s not much to miss.”

“You’re lucky.” Raine made eye contact with him and Mal noted how beautiful she looked with the flames reflecting off her face, in her eyes.

He cleared his throat and nodded in her direction, urging her to go on.

“Before this whole thing started, I took so much for granted.” She explained.

“I find myself thinking about Riverbend all the time. Going down to the tavern, spending time with Kade, not having a care in the world. It’s kind of funny now, I guess. I used to want out so badly…now I’d give anything to go back…”

Raine intensely stared into the fire, throwing piece after piece of another stick in with ferocity. She seemed mad, almost angry and agitated.

Threep was right. Mal told himself. Better be careful.

“I think, uh…I mean, I think it’s okay to miss stuff, sometimes.  Just because I don’t doesn’t mean you shouldn’t. It’s nice that you have somewhere and someone to miss, you know? That’s probably what it feels like to have a home.”

Raine looked up at him, pulling her gaze away from the fire for a second.

“Mal, I’m sorry. I’m being so insensitive -- to be bringing this up now and burdening you with my ridiculous problems. I know how absurd all of this sounds.”

“Raine. Stop.”

He slowly sat up and went to sit beside her. He questioned whether to take her hand. He decided against it but encouraged her to continue.

“I want to hear what’s bothering you. If it matters to you, it…” he paused, why was he so afraid?

“It sounds nice. It helps me to get my mind off things too. This whole life of adventuring, fighting off evil villains, plundering for gold and succumbing to wild vixens’ charms, is sometimes insufferable, you know?”

He knocked his shoulder into hers as she chuckled, looking at her feet. Mal made a mental note of how good it made him feel to know he was the reason for her smile or laugh.

“I’m curious.” He looked at her sideways. “What do you miss the most?”

Rain smiled slightly but tightened her jaw at the same time. She bit her lip before answering.

“No – I can’t tell you. You’ll never let me live it down. I know you too well.”

This, of course, was intriguing to Mal. He now saw a challenge. He would stop at nothing to get her to tell him her secret.

  “Is it the smell of mead right out of the barrel?” He asked, knowing there was no way that could be true.

Raine smiled and shook her head no.

“Hmm, how about shoveling the stables when you needed some extra coin?” He bumped into her again, trying to get her to open up.

“That would be crazy.” She feigned annoyance with him, enjoying his attention and company.

“Last guess…you miss days upon days of utter boredom, staring out your window wondering when adventure would find you.”

“It’s true – I did do that…and now that I have it, here I am. Running away in the middle of the night to wonder and worry about what’s to come. Some adventurer I’ve turned out to be.”

Raine sighed ruefully and returned her stare to the fire.

A loud boom of thunder rolled over the forest and hillside area where the group had settled for the evening, making both Mal and Raine jump.

“That was unexpect—” Mal was cut off by another loud clap of thunder and a lightning strike in the distance that was bright enough to illuminate most of the kingdom.

Impulsively, Raine leaned into Mal and he wrapped his arms around her tight, yelling out a loud “Yoooo!” When the lightening hit.

No rain was falling yet but clearly some was moving in. The smell was now heavy in the air and the wind was picking up quickly.

“Dancing.” Raine said, out of nowhere. “I miss dancing.”

Sheepishly, she looked up at him from under her long, thick lashes. He was holding her now and he could see the light brown freckles that danced across her face, under her eyes and over her nose. The small specks of dark brown in her hazel eyes were practically glowing.

“Raine…” He whispered her name, mesmerized by her.  

Soft tendrils of hair danced around her face as he tried to build up the courage to share with her what he was actually thinking and feeling.

“I have one memory, it seems so silly now but it keeps coming to my mind as I think about Kade. We had been paid to take care of some pigs…just for a few days…and they were horrible little things. They would not stay in the pen no matter what we did! And there were so may of them. They just kept appearing. It was like they were multiplying right before our eyes…”

Mal relaxed his grip on her but kept one arm around her as she told her story. It was engaging to see her physically light up, regaling him with a tale this time instead of it being the other way around.  

“We finally got them all back in the pen together and it started pouring. Coming down in buckets! It was horrible and so muddy. One piglet escaped again, then another and another. Kade and I were slipping and sliding around in the mud and got so incredibly dirty and we smelled SO bad!”

Raine was laughing now, remembering it and how it must have looked.

“It wasn’t funny at the time but thinking about it now – we were so happy when the whole ordeal was over that we literally danced IN the rain, all the way home.  It wasn’t a horrible storm or anything, but we soaked up all that water to wash away the dirt and grime from that horrible pig farm.  We sang and danced and danced and sang; silly songs, just bouncing along, huge smiles on our faces.  We were just so happy, then.”

Mal held onto her more tightly now, feeling the sadness creep back into her body as she tensed up.

“At that time, we had no idea what…what was to come…”

She let out a long, deep sigh and leaned into Mal as he stroked his hand up and down her arm.

“Thinking about home and, now this storm coming in, it brings it all back like it was yesterday.”

“I don’t think it’s any accident your name is Raine.” Mal stated, timidly.

The voice in his head once again announced itself - Now is not the time to be a coward. You can do this.

She looked at him quizzically but let him continue. He spoke in hushed tones, voice just above a whisper as light drops fell from the sky, almost a mist, they were so faint.

“You’re so similar to this…” He gestured to the sky as it began.  

“I’ve seen you be like that lightning and thunder we witnessed. When you’re going after something you want you can be a bit violent…” he chuckled, “winds and rain so heavy you can’t see – it’s blinding the passion and love you have for your family and friends.”

“Other times you’re barely there, so sweet and soft, falling like this right now…all around, leaving an impact on everything you touch even if it’s a small one…” he held his hand out watching the moisture collect upon it.

“In the time that I’ve known you, you’re always steady, doing your job to replenish all that is around you – rain when rain falls it creates this rhythm, a pattern, constant and predictable. You’re there no matter what. You do what you can to make the people you care about feel better.”

Mal hugged her and pulled her in close, resting his chin on her head as she settled into the crook of his neck, breathing in his scent.

“Storms like the one rolling in sometimes sit in one place and stay for a long time, hovering over an area for days; or they clear out quickly but still leave traces behind…puddles in the street, streaks on windows, that kind of thing…”

“Mal…” Raine looked up at him, tears forming in her eyes.

You have to finish this.

“Shh…” he held a gentle finger up to her lips, asking her to not to interrupt him without using words.

“You told me tonight that sometimes you miss your old life and sometimes you don’t – you live for the adventure but long to be at home and that’s like those crazy days where it’s raining in one place, all hot and humid in the other, but still dry as a bone. Two places so close together experiencing such different things…it’s just like you, hot and cold sometimes. You know?”

Raine wiped a few tears off her cheeks, remaining silent. Waiting to see if Mal was done.  

“Just like the actual rain, you always have a purpose and you never leave without having achieved your goals…remember that, Raine. It’s one of the reasons I admire you so much…”

Tears still streaming down her face, Raine reached up and kissed Mal, tenderly, sweetly and longingly. Hoping to convey to him how much his little soliloquy meant to her, just now.

“Oh good.” He breathed a sigh of relief after the kiss.  “I was afraid I said too much and made you mad…” Mal smiled, blushing slightly.

Rain was actually falling more heavily now, the wind was really picking up and the temperature was dropping.

“No one has ever…” Raine bit her lip, quickly but then carried on, “…said anything so kind and sincere and beautiful to me or about me before, I…”

Mal interrupted her, taking her hand and standing up.  

“If you miss dancing, then let’s dance.”

He circled his arms around her waist while she let hers drape around his neck.

“In the rain?” She laughed, looking up at the sky, letting the water fall on her face.  

“In the rain.” Mal repeated, smiling and laughing while watching her.

They danced slowly, circling around as the rain continued to fall. Every so often thunder would roll through again, but the lightning had subsided.

“I’m still just speechless, Mal.  I had no idea there was so much more to you than you’re showing or letting on…”

Mal winked at her as he pulled her in closer to him, looking down at her. With a smirk, he responded, “Ah very good, very good.  That’s just the way I like it, kit.”

[blazerina]

Hundreds of Tomorrows - (Mal x MC) - Blades of Light & Shadows

Hundreds of Tomorrows

Word Count: 3053

A/N: This is a little thing that I picture starting and happening before Nia, Tyril and MC (Raine) go behind the glass wall where only those with magic can pass. This was from chapter 11 (I think?) when they’re in the catacombs. I’m not very good at remembering details from the chapters. 

I took a few liberties to change up what exactly happened behind the wall so it’s not exactly in line with the rest of BOLAS (please don’t hate me or send me messages about how wrong I am). Also, I freaking LOVE Threep and his banter/relationship with Mal.  

This story comes at the request of @choicesobsessed  who sent a prompt for “Is that blood? ...No?” from a prompt list I posted a while ago. It fit perfectly with this idea I already had so ta-da!

Hope everyone reading this is doing well and staying safe! Please enjoy!

xoxo

--

“Kit, a word please?” Mal said inquisitively, his eyebrow raised in mock curiosity.  He motioned for Raine to follow him to a more secluded area.

“Keep your voice down.” He instructed as Raine followed him.

“Keep my voice down?” She questioned.

“You do realize the rest of the group is right over there…”

Mal sighed in agitation.

“Okay then, m’lady, let’s talk behind this here rock. Is that better?”

The two of them circled around a rather large boulder that was still not much further from the group.

“Oh much. Much better.” She smirked. “What’s your deal? We don’t have a lot of time and we need to check out what’s behind that magic wall.”

“Are you sure about this?” Mal asked, searching her eyes for the truth. “I mean like, really, totally, 100% sure?”

“Sure about what?” Raine asked, confused.

“Going behind the magic wall with only elf-boy to protect you? I don’t think it’s safe.”  Mal cut right to the point.

“Ooohhh….” Raine teased. “I see what this is about…”

She folded her arms in front of her chest and leaned back against the rock that was supposedly concealing their conversation.

“Nothing. It’s not about anything.” Mal squinted his eyes in frustration, stumbling a little bit and working very hard to make his point. He didn’t want to be obvious, but apparently he was failing miserably.

“Mmhmm.” Raine scoffed.  “Listen, I don’t only have Tyril to protect me. Nia is coming and so is Threep.”

“Raine.”

Mal looked down his nose at her, wishing she would realize this was actually not a time to joke. For him to be serious meant it really indeed was…serious.

“You cannot be serious. You think that cat-bat is going to be able to save you?”

“He is a nesper, Mal, not a cat-bat. You really need to stop calling him that. And I don’t know why you’re wasting my time right now.”

She stood up straighter, ready to confront him.

“We will be safe. Everything is fine. You’re acting this way mainly because you don’t want to be left here with Imtura AND you’re afraid of missing out on adventure. You’re upset that you’re not being included.”

Mal’s mouth hung open ready to protest, but Raine quickly closed the space between them kissed him on the cheek. She lingered a little bit and whispered in his ear.

“But I do think it’s awfully cute you’re so protective of me.”

She pulled away, looking him in the eye and giving him a quick wink, before walking away.

“Raine!”

Mal called out.

“Wait!”

She turned around, shoulders slumped, groaning in frustration. “What is it now?!”

“Just, be careful. Please. I…I don’t like not going in there with you…if anything happened – I – I –“

Raine stopped joking around, once she realized the serious tone Mal was using.                                                                                                                                        

“Don’t worry – I’ll come back to you.” She nodded, confirming what she just said.

Raine then jogged towards Nia and Tyril who were waiting at the entrance to the wall.

--

“Look lover boy, I know that you’re smitten with our very own land rat, but you have got to calm down.”

Imtura was perched on top of a large black rock while Mal paced nervously back and forth in front of her, tossing a small pebble up and down.

“If you don’t stop tossing that ridiculous little rock, I’m going to smash you one more time into that magic wall and leave you for dead.”

Mal ignored her, continued pacing, but did at least stop tossing the rock.  

“See here – there’s one thing that us sneaky humans have over your orc tribe. We have this sixth sense. This gut feeling about things. And I’m telling you something’s not right about all this. Any of this…it’s just really, really messed up…”

Mal was suddenly distracted looking deep into the eyes of a half-charred statue looking rock that had grabbed his attention.

“I mean, what the hell is that? This is not normal.” He said as he gestured to the piece of art he found.

“Nothing about this is normal. Pull your head out of your arse, boy. Look around you – has anything we’ve experienced the past few weeks been normal?

If you’re looking for normal you best leave now because it’s only going to get weirder if you ask me…” Imtura spat, picking something out of her jowls.

Mal mad a face, clearly disgusted by her behavior. “You’re one of a kind, you know that, Im?”

He wiped his hands along the front of his vest, suddenly feeling dirty. He huffed loudly as he plopped down on the ground.

“When are they going to be baaaack?!” He whined, keeping his eyes closed. “This is the worst!”

“That’s them. Mal!” Imtura was laughing, happy to see the rest of their crew. “They’re alive. They made it. Here they come!”

Threep was leading the crew, actually using his wings to fly, and hovering a little bit in front of everyone.

“Mal before you see her you need to know that…”

“I am fine!” Raine called from the back of the group leaning on Tyril and limping a bit. She was holding her side and trying her best not to grimace.

“Raine? What happened? Is she okay? Are you okay?”

Tyril gingerly helped Raine to sit down, Nia followed and tried to console Mal.

“She really is fine, Mal. I can heal her, don’t worry.  I just need a moment…”

“Is that blood?!” Mal asked, pointing to Raine’s side where a dark spot had begun to form beneath her hands.

“…No?” Raine lied, not wanting to upset him.

“Why is everyone more worried about Mal than the actual person who is injured?!” Threep squawked still flying above everyone else.

“Fix her. Fix her now.” Mal ordered, looking at Nia. “Do it. Let’s go – why are we waiting around?”

“I don’t want her to.” Raine’s voice was raised slightly and forceful.

“We do need to make a decision. We got what we came for, it’s time we head back. The longer we are here the longer we are in danger.” Tyril explained, adding pressure to the current situation.

“Mal – calm down.” Raine hissed, through gritted teeth, obviously in pain. “We need to get out of here. I don’t want Nia wasting life on me and I know I can make it. Let’s go.”

Mal tried to protest but Raine shot him down immediately with a cold and hard stare.

He resigned himself to the fact that Raine was not changing her mind.

“Let me help…” he tried to loop her arm around his shoulder, but Raine was stubborn.

“Raine – are you sure?” Tyril asked one final time.

Nia was nervously biting her lip, Imtura was staying quiet and Threep was nosing through Raine’s bag while the rest of them looked to one another to make a decision.

“Too bad jerky doesn’t make you feel better like it does me.” He chuckled, his head popping up out of the bag with a mouthful.

The entire group swiveled their heads to scowl at him.

Threep began to nervously laugh as he lowered himself back into the bag. “Wrong time to joke?” He asked, retreating quickly.

“Why does everyone keep asking if I’m sure?” Raine growled.  “First Mal, now you, Tyril. Have I ever not known my own mind?”

“Don’t answer that.” Threep instructed from inside Raine’s bag. Imtura had taken ownership of the satchel so that Raine wouldn’t be saddled with it.

--

The group walked in silence most of the way back to the Starfury house. Everyone was exhausted from the information they had found out about Kaya and the news they’d now be looking for a shard at the masquerade the next day. It seemed as though this troupe would never know a moment of rest – they continued on from one adventure to another in their quest against the Shadow Court.

Once they arrived at the manor, it was without question that each one of them would retire to their quarters in order to sleep well and rest before the ball. Without saying a word, all of them with the exception of Raine, communicated with each other, proving their trust and reliance on their teammates.

Imtura checked on Threep once more before handing the bag to Mal and telling everyone goodnight. Tyril nodded as he passed Raine over to him as well.

“She’s all yours.” He muttered under his breath.

“Raine, be well. I’m just down the hall if you need anything.” Nia cooed, almost prancing along the way to her room.

“I’ll take it from here.” Mal nodded, standing behind Raine.

She turned to look at him and arched an eyebrow. “What exactly are you taking where?”

“Lead the way, kit. I’m just gonna make sure you’re all tucked in, then you’ll be rid of me.”

--

Once to her room, Mal helped Threep out of the bag, accepting his content purring as thanks.

“Yeah yeah, calm down you crossbreed.” Mal stood up and waited by the door for Raine to get settled.

She was sitting on the edge of the bed, still holding her side.

“I’m not going to ask about it because I quite like my head being attached to my body…” Mal began.

Raine tried not to smile but she couldn’t help it. Being alone with Mal always made her feel better.

“I’ll be leaving you alone now if you’re all right. Did the bleeding actually stop?” He questioned, opening the door, about to leave.

“I’m not sure.” Raine said softly, suddenly preoccupied with the hem of her shirt. “I think…I think I need your help.”

“I’m sorry. What was that? Not sure I heard you correctly. Did you say you…you need my help?” Mal teased, closing the door and moving closer to her on the bed.

“Mal. Now isn’t the time. This is hard for me.” Raine answered, truthfully.

“Ah. Forgive me – it’s a real bucket of rainbows and sunshine for me right now too.” He tried to joke, sitting down next to her on the bed.

Silence hung in the air heavy and weighted as they stared stoically at one another. She looked at him and cursed herself for making him feel bad when all he was trying to do earlier was show he cared. He looked at her hoping she would one day understand just what she meant to him.

Clearing his throat, his voice weak and coming out more like a hoarse whisper, Mal asked, “What, um…what can I help you with? What do you need?”

“I need you to look at the wound and see if the bleeding has stopped.” Rain responded, snapping out of her silent reverie.

Her mind had suddenly travelled to the memory of Mal’s lips on hers and their skin touching together, the fire it created. This fire was not like the magic she was learning to make; it was different. Hotter. Deeper. Less fleeting. More substantial and real.

Mal nodded as Raine pulled her shirt up slightly, to reveal a small gash about an inch and a half long. The bleeding had stopped, and it didn’t appear to be deep but Mal could not know for sure.

“It’s no longer bleeding but that is the only thing I’m certain of.” He held her hand now, trying his best to be soft and caring.

“Do you have medicine?” He asked, suddenly standing up. “In your bag, the salve you’ve made before. Do you have any of it left?”

Raine was struggling to stay awake, so tired and fatigued from the day’s events and now weak due to her injury. She mumbled something as her eyes started to close.

“Raine! Raine.  Stay with me for just a little bit longer.” Mal was pulling item after item out of Raine’s bag.

“A stinger? You saved this from the Drakna?” He asked, completely dumbfounded as he pulled more and more random things from her satchel.

“Good gods you can hold a lot of stuff in here!” Mal smiled, looking at her now laying down on the bed.

“Huzzah! I found it!” He shouted triumphantly and held the small bottle up above his head as though it was the most sought-after treasure in the land.

Proud of himself, he sat down next to her on the bed as she was still fighting sleep.

“C’mere girl. Just hold still. That’s it.”

He softly applied the cream to her injury, rubbing around the edges as tenderly as his calloused fingers would allow.

“I’m sorry if it hurts.” He whispered, watching her face for any reaction. Her eyes were closed, and her breathing was steady.

Finding an old piece of cloth in her bag, Mal poured more of the salve on the rag and was able to tie it off around Raine’s small waist. She was quiet and compliant.

“I don’t know that I’ve ever seen you stay completely silent before, kit.  It’s kind of nice.” He mocked, drawing a big smile from the girl.

“Mal. That’s enough. Thank you. I’m quite settled now.”

He was now going through some drawers in a large armoir found in the corner of Raine’s room. Finding what he was looking for he tossed a long white nightgown on the bed.

“This’ll do. You need to change – I won’t look.”

“Yes, you will.” Raine challenged. “I wasn’t born yesterday, you know.”

“You’re probably right…” He scratched his chin, deep in thought about what he might see if he kept his eyes open.

Snapping himself out of it, he continued.

“…but here, I’ll help and then when you need me too I’ll look away. I promise.” He said those last two words with a sincerity Raine wasn’t sure existed in him.

“As I’ve said before, you do continue to surprise me, Mal the Rogue.”

Raine chuckled lightly, pulling the shirt she was wearing over her head. She winced a bit and Mal assisted as best he could, closing his eyes and turning his head away when she disrobed completely.

Mal helped her back into bed having turned down the covers, letting her head settle on two pillows, getting her under the blankets and stuffing her in tight.

Threep was out like a light in the corner, snoring loudly. Mal made note of it but decided against a comment, trying instead to focus all his attention on Raine.

“Thank you.” She whispered, looking up at him before her eyes closed for the night. “For all of this. I don’t deserve it after the way I treated you, today.  Really.”

“Now, now. I’m sure I’ll find a way for you to make it up to me sometime soon.”

She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. “Will you stay with me, please?” She mumbled, falling into a rhythmic sleep almost immediately.

“Yes!” Mal fist pumped instinctively, getting what he had hoped for.

He said a silent prayer of thanks to the gods and walked around the bed to the other side. He laid down his weapons but as he took off his boots, realized again just how loud Threep was snoring. He threw one of his boots at him, waking the nesper up with a hiss.

“What was that for?!” Threep was more than agitated.

“You’re snoring!” Mal whispered harshly. “I’m staying the night and I need to get some shuteye.”

“You’re staying the night?” Threep’s eyes grew wide. “I should have gone with Imtura.”

“Yeah, you should have.” Mal quipped, “She’s the only one of the group who snores louder than you and wouldn’t be bothered.”

Threep stood up, made three circles and laid back down again, nestling against the wall and falling asleep again with a loud and dramatic huff.

Mal worked to get into bed but was careful not to disturb Raine. He stayed on top of the covers that Raine was underneath. He quickly realized in his effort to prop her up on the pillows, that meant there weren’t any left on the bed. So he got out of bed once again and grabbed the satchel to rest his head upon.

He sighed to himself with his hands resting on his stomach, content to be settled next to Raine, knowing she was okay, and most of all, that she wanted him to be with her, at least for tonight.

Realizing the adrenaline of this moment was keeping him awake, he rolled over onto his side to stare at the sleeping woman next to him.

“Will I stay?” Mal said quietly as his eyes took in her features.

He loved the light freckles that danced over her face, beneath her eyes and over the bridge of her nose. The way her lips were a soft shade of pink and her cheeks a natural rose; her golden hair in a tight braid that always rested on one side of her head, exposing the area of her neck that he knew he’d love to kiss over and over again.

Mal could not believe himself. He had never felt anything like these intense feelings. He was in shock that he already felt so strongly for someone he didn’t really know all that well.

He was completely certain that he loved the feeling of her hand in his. And he knew something was real if he was truthfully scared to think of anything happening to her when he wasn’t around to protect her.

He reached across her and took her hand once again, then softly and sweetly laced his fingers in between hers, his thumb rubbing small smoothing circles across her knuckles.

“What are you doing to me, kit? You may be making an honest man out of me…and I have never, ever, wanted to be one of those until now…”

He brought her hand to his lips and let them linger there for a while. He didn’t want to take his gaze off her for fear something would happen to change the moment, to change the way she felt about him, to change their relationship, if that’s indeed what it was.

He silently brushed a single tendril of hair off her face and leaned forward to kiss her forehead.

“Will I stay, Raine?” He whispered, smiling to himself.

“That’s not even a question. I will stay tonight and hundreds of tomorrows if you’ll have me, sweet girl.”

[blazerina]

What To Do (Open Heart MC)

A/N: This is just a little drabble for this Saturday night, while I am missing the LIs in OH. Hope you enjoy!! Love and peace to all!! xoxoxo

p.s. I wrote this on my phone so the formatting is weird and I couldn’t really make it look the way I wanted...

@parkerattano @queencarb @custaroonie @mkamra2355 @humanpokemon @ramseysno1rookie @unknowntimelady @myusualnerdyself @schnitzelbutterfinger @mvalentine @jasminedayz @thanialis @tefigranger @kenzierookie @justanotherrookie @keepcreativechoices @heauxplesslydevoted @ethandaddyramsey @kaavyaethanramsey @sherlockedmcu @edith-eggs1  @noboundariesplease @edgiestwinter @danysims4cc @tempesreture @unusualvisionsblog @chasingrobbie @mapipa @lifeof-liv @3riche-blog @anonymous2094 @annaidziaszczyk @ntoraplayschoices @jessirosebud @mskinkyafro @caseyvalentineramsey

^^ please don’t hate me y’all! 😘

—

As soon as the door to the supply closet closed, Allie slid down the wall to the floor. Her chest was heaving and she was having trouble catching her breath as the tears began to fall.

She felt completely overwhelmed. June made her feel like a total idiot in their team meeting earlier too, which didn’t help. She wasn’t sleeping, worries about balancing Esme, the diagnostic team, her patients, her studies and her friendships kept her up at night. Not to mention the small issue of Ethan, on top of all that.

The reality of their situation was crushing her. Every time she felt like she might be able to come up for air and take a quick breath, he’d look at her in that way...their hands would brush against each other...or they’d find themselves alone long enough to reconnect and ignite a tiny spark of hope that maybe, just maybe, they’d figure it out once again and find a way to be together.

She couldn’t come up for air, she just kept swimming in deep, dark, murky water that kept her from seeing her future clearly and made her feel weighed down. No time for breathing, but eventually she’d run out of oxygen and that essentially what was happening now.

It always took a lot for Allie to get to the point where actual tears were shed. She cried when she was angry and when she just couldn’t take it anymore.

This closet was her favorite one to hide away in. No one ever knew she was in there. These supplies and shelves had definitely witnessed their fair share of her epic meltdowns.

She checked her watch and sighed heavily leaning her head back against the cool wall. She was steadily breathing now but the tears were flowing. She felt like every situation she found herself in had no logical solution. She didn’t know what to do or how to make herself feel more confident. And she absolutely hated the feeling of not knowing what to do.

She used the sleeve of her white coat to wipe her nose and then angrily huffed when she realized her makeup left a stain. She started sniffling trying to keep her nose from running, but froze in place when she saw the door handle turn.

From her spot on the floor, Allie looked up at the doctor who entered and immediately burst into even more tears. She kept her eyes shut tight, not wanting to deal with even more conflicting emotions.

The doctor immediately sat down next to her, between two metal shelving units. Their bodies were pressed together, squeezed in a tiny spot on a cold hard floor. His arm wrapped around her shoulders as he pulled her close.

He rested his chin on top of her head and whispered to her.

“It’s okay...it’s going to be okay.”

They sat in silence as he ran his fingertips up and down her arm, trying his best to soothe her.

“How did you know I was in here?”

Her green eyes were somehow more intense now that she’d been crying. She looked up at him, grateful for his companionship in this moment.

“Because I know you, Allie. I’ve watched you for almost two whole years now. You honestly think I haven’t paid attention to when you’re stressed or having a hard time?”

She sighed, leaning against him and resting her head on his shoulder.

After a few more moments of silence, she pulled herself off of him and away from his intoxicating smell.

“How do I look? Am I a complete mess? I mean, I know I am on the inside, but I can’t look like that on the outside.”

Allie started dabbing her eyes, taking deep breaths and trying to pull herself together.

He stared at her, watching her calm down slowly and methodically just the way any good doctor would work through a problem.

“No one would ever know anything was the matter. But then again, you always look like a million bucks to me.”

He smiled slyly, leaning in to kiss her forehead gently. He stood up quickly to create some space while extending his hand to her.

“Okay. Let’s do this.”

Allie took his hand and stood up, dusting herself off and shaking her shoulders to loosen up.

“Duty calls.” She nodded, trying to motivate herself.

“Bryce...” she caught his arm as he reached for the door.

“Thank you.” She smiled tightly and then went in for a hug.

“Anytime.” He winked, opening the door, letting Allie exit first.

“Ah, there you are, Dr. Valentine. And...Dr...Lahela?”

Ethan was now before them, chart in hand with a look of confusion on his face, and once again Allie had no idea what to do.

[blazerina]

Give 👏🏻 me 👏🏻 my 👏🏻 angst 👏🏻 right @angstymarshmallow ?!

[blazerina]

Show You (Ethan x MC)

Show You – Ethan x MC

A/N – I do not feel confident in this…fluff is not my thing lately so there’s a little undercurrent of angst at some moments throughout this one.  I may continue it if I have more ideas come to me – we’ll see!  Hope you enjoy, for all my soft-Ethan fans.

@parkerattano this is to make up for not ending that other story the way you wanted me to & also for @justanotherrookie who has totally inspired all the Ethan content I’ve had lately. She’s amazing and everyone should read her stuff. 

Thanks to you both!

--

“You’re late.” Ethan called out to Allie as she walked in the door, harried and frazzled.

“I know, I know. I’m sorry…” She fumbled with her heels trying to get them off as fast a she could.They had a strict rule about not wearing shoes inside their home.  

Ethan was in the kitchen. The aroma alone was enough to make Allie’s stomach grumble. She hadn’t had a thing to eat all day except for a granola bar and a fun-size pack of peanut M&M’s.

“Did they have questions?” Ethan turned around to meet Allie in the kitchen with a kiss on the cheek and a glass of wine.

“Ugh, thank you.” She took a quick sip and nodded her head.

“They always do this. I give them an exam and then they loiter around afterwards expecting their questions to somehow translate into me believing they are brilliant, thus resulting in a better final grade.”

“Sounds about right.” Ethan chuckled, wiping his hands on a towel.  “They’re helpless. Competitive. Desperate. Using any means necessary to one up each other.”

Ethan trailed off as he absentmindedly sipped his own wine, gazing out the window. Allie studied him, wondering why he didn’t seem one hundred percent himself.

“Was your day okay?” She asked, suddenly concerned. “I knew you were coming home early, but you’re already working on dessert.  You must have been home a while.”

She always got nervous when Ramsey was in the kitchen.  He was an adequate cook, but actually a truly amazing baker. It was a secret, but he loved it.  He told her once that on days when he felt out of control it helped him regain some kind power of a situation. Adding ingredients together and following a recipe precisely, would always equate to the finished product of his choice. It helped him cope in a world and a profession that was sometimes so unpredictable.

“I left early. Needed to clear my head.” He wandered back to the stand mixer on the counter and Allie followed.

Wrapping her arms around him from behind, she stood on her tiptoes and rested her head on his shoulder. Looking into the bowl, she realized what he was making.

“Is that angel food cake?!” She got excited.

Ethan nodded. “Very observant of you.”

“Let me help.”

She wanted to get his mind off whatever it was that was bothering him. In their years together she knew by now not to prod and that he’d share with her when he was ready.

It had been a while since they’d been able to enjoy a night in and a home-cooked meal together. Allie had taken on a more permanent teaching role in the medical school associated with Edenbrook. Even though she thought it would mean a more regular schedule, the students had proven to be quite demanding and she missed focusing on the diagnostics team, her own intern and other cases with Ethan.

“I’m not sure you really know what you’re doing so, best leave this to the expert.” He told her, getting back to the mixing.

“Excuse me! I am actually a pretty good cook in my own right, thank you very much.”

Feigning offense, Allie grabbed an apron from the pantry and put it on over her professional dress. She quickly used the hair tie that had been around her wrist to throw her long, auburn locks up on top of her head.

“What’s next?” She quirked an eyebrow at him, mixing spoon in hand.

“I just whipped the egg whites. It’s time to fold in the flour.  You know how to do that?” Ethan challenged.

Allie swallowed hard. She was kind of teasing him and wanting to make the evening fun, but she also knew he was serious about this. She couldn’t say no to a challenge, but didn’t want to risk ruining the evening by ruining his dessert. It sounded funny in her mind as her brain reasoned out the logic, but she knew to tread lightly with this one.

Instead of actually doing it, and afraid she really would mess it up, she turned around and faced him with a question.

“Folding. Hmm…” her brow crinkled. “That’s like, stirring slowly and lifting your hand up like this?”

Allie mimicked what she believed the correct folding motion to be.

“Not even close. Let me show you.” Ethan resumed his position in front of the mixing bowl and expertly folded the flour into the egg white mixture.

“You try.” He moved out of the way and let Allie stand in front of the bowl.  

He leaned in next to her while she concentrated, trying to reproduce his exact motion.

“I usually do about ½ a cup at a time. Makes it easier.”  

As Allie finished, she triumphantly smiled. “Okay, you’ve proven you’re superior in yet another area…can I be excused?” She laughed, giving him a quick kiss. “I’m going to go change.”

Ethan rolled his eyes and continued working on the cake.

“Go. Dinner will be ready in 10.” He lightly swatted her behind as she trotted off to put on something more comfortable.

--

The two of them made general conversation over dinner. They talked about plans they had coming up to join friends and other professional colleagues at a fundraiser across town the next weekend. Ethan told her about some new pieces the local symphony was putting together.  He wanted to attend some concerts later in the month as well. Allie reminded him that his father’s birthday was coming up soon and they needed to decide what to get him.

Evenings like this were rare for both of them. Being home together; having time to relax and actually connect over a meal and have meaningful conversation; not discussing work – it was the glue that held them together when their lives felt overrun and they each felt pulled in a million directions at once.

After dinner, Allie cleaned up the kitchen as was their custom. If he cooked, she cleaned. Ethan had settled into his home office, catching up on journal articles relating to some of his current cases.

Pouring another glass of wine for them both, Allie went to find him.  She stood in the doorway, watching him for a few minutes before joining him at his computer. She put the wine down on the edge of the desk and then slid into his lap, sitting sideways, with her arms around his neck.  His glasses were falling down his nose a little when he smiled at her, kissing her shoulder as he inhaled her scent.

She silently pushed them up on his face and then held his face in her hands while giving him a long, slow kiss.

“Thank you for tonight.” Allie smiled, looking intently into his eyes.

He seemed so tired to her. So worn down.  Something was definitely eating at him, but she wasn’t sure what it was. Her hope was that he’d come to bed soon and not stay up all night doing research. That tenacity was something she admired and loved him for butb getting him to take a break sometimes was difficult.

Ethan leaned his forehead against hers and shut his eyes for a second. Allie could feel the tension in his body release for a brief moment.

“I wish we had more time.” He whispered.

“Me too.” Allie hugged him, pulling him closer to her, absorbing the quiet around them for a few more seconds.

“What have we got tonight, doc?” She smiled, looking back at the computer screen. “How can I help?”

Ethan sat up a little more straight and went into explanation mode.

“I’m looking into syndrome of inappropriate antidiuretic hormone. Otherwise known as SIAH.  I honestly don’t know a lot about it and our patient is presenting symptoms but I’m not sure that’s the diagnosis we will land on.” He reached around Allie to move the cursor on the page in front of her.

“Hey! What happened with Mr. Lorenzo…I know you weren’t supposed to tell me his name and no I haven’t said anything to anyone…” She scoffed.  “Was I right?”

“As much as it pains me to say it, yes.  You helped a great deal on that case, and we were able to release him yesterday or the day before I believe.” Ethan pushed his glasses up on his nose once more as he leaned in closer to the screen to continue reading.

“Woo hoo! I get another point.” Allie gingerly got off Ethan’s lap and went to a bulletin board hanging on the wall of the office. Two pieces of scratch paper, one labeled “E” and one labeled “A” had tally marks on them.  Ethan had about 20 and Allie had maybe 7, now 8.  It was their way of keeping score on tough cases and diagnoses.

“Still a long way from that vacation in the Bahamas.” Ethan added, watching her victoriously document her new point.

“What was it I said I wanted if I got to 25 first?”

“Something dumb, like a new leather recliner…” Allie sighed.  “My prize is way better and something BOTH of us can use!”

Allie realized Ethan was no longer listening. He had found something. She saw the look in his eyes as he beckoned her over.

“Honey, look…” he explained to her what he had found.

“Antidepressants.  Our patient has been struggling with mental health related issues but we haven’t been able to get her to admit exactly what those are…however, she’s been on and off antidepressants for several years now, contributing to her SIAH…that has to be it…or part of it…it’s right there and I didn’t’ see it before…”

“Nuh uh, Ramsey. No way. I’m not counting this one. We need to make a new deal that only one point can be awarded per day. Whoever gets it first gets to keep it.” Allie argued.

Ethan smiled a little and gave in. “As you wish.”

“With that, I bid you goodnight. I better get out of here before I lose all 8 points I’ve worked so hard for.”

Allie took a deep dramatic bow, thanked him and excused herself as she realized it was getting late and she had no idea how much longer he’d be researching.

--

A few minutes later, Allie was getting out of the shower when she heard Ethan call from the bedroom.

“Coming to bed soon?” He asked.

She was surprised to hear his voice and that he was already in bed. Was he feeling alright? She asked herself. This was just not the norm for him.

“Be right there.” She responded.

“I’m exhausted. Lights are going off.” He told her while stifling a yawn and rolling over onto his side.

In the dark, seconds later, Allie was gently rolling Ethan onto his back while she straddled him. Wearing one of his button-down shirts and nothing else, her long damp hair slicked back, away from her face, she leaned over him, smiling.

Ethan was not one to ever decline Allie’s advances. He grinned looking up at her, surprised a little by her forwardness but not upset by it.

She leaned in and kissed him slowly and passionately.

“I love you.” She whispered, looking into his gray blue eyes.

“I love you too.” He trailed his hands up and down her arms, taking in the sight of her.

“What are you doing, Mrs. Ramsey?” Ethan inquired.

They had been married for a few years now, but she still went by Dr. Valentine professionally. Ethan was the only person in the world who ever referred to her that way.

“You’ve shown me a few things this evening…” She explained, sitting up a little straighter, but maintaining eye contact with him.

“How to fold in flour…” She started to kiss up and down his neck, lingering just below his earlobe.

“…and about that other syndrome thing…” she kissed him again this time slightly biting his bottom lip, eliciting a groan from Ethan as he inhaled sharply.  

He pulled her into him, returning her kiss fervently his tongue finding hers, their passion and desire for one another mounting.

Ethan smiled as Allie moved in closer to him again. He pulled her onto him and held her close, chest to chest, before she added in a husky, sultry voice:

“So naturally, I thought it was my turn to show you a thing or two…”